My Custom Blended Mind........

Deadline Made!

2012-02-01T22:02:00.000-08:00

Made my deadline for a scholarship I am hoping to use in the coming fall. Had to be postmarked by yesterday.

My FAFSA application went through too.

Looks like Kissy's going to be in school soon!!

Off to the woods tomorrow for a week, will post (I promise) when I get there and catch up with all your pages too!

Me Oh My!

2012-01-24T13:16:00.000-08:00

I am so busy with a deadline for the 31st of this month.

I'm sorry I haven't blogged in months. I'm fine, I just have been super busy. The holidays kept me crocheting like mad and right now I am running around like mad preparing a bunch of documents for a scholarship which is due on the above date.

More to come, I just haven't wanted to blog as I haven't had much to say, or show. I will have plenty to say when I meet my deadline.

I hope you all had wonderful holidayz...

Horrible Horrible

2011-10-18T18:54:00.000-07:00

That is me, I know.

Have been such a horrible blogger, but like editors changing at magazines like Vogue to bring in new life, that is exactly what I am trying to do with this blog which is now nearly 10 years old.

When you have been blogging as long as I have, sometimes you just get complacent and you want to do something different. But where to begin?

I'm out here in the woods again crafting and creating, I should be taking pictures of our progress. I promise!

Something will change around here in the land of the lostboy, I promise!

10 Years Ago: My Reaction to 9/11

2011-09-11T04:50:00.000-07:00

I was sleeping in that morning because it was my day off from both my jobs: waiting tables at a Chinese place and working at a video store. I went to bed happy the night before extremely happy because it was payday and I was going to get haircut. I had worked 2 weeks straight and had 3 days off from both jobs and I was elated. I was in Boise, Idaho.

My then boyfriend (Rusty) came in and woke me up and said "We've been attacked. They're gone. The twin towers are gone."

My first reaction when I sat up I blurted out "Have ya called Cindy and asked her where the fuck Jake has been the last 24 hours?" Jake was a mutual friend who liked to make mini explosives out of packages of sparklers and fireworks. So, naturally having witnessed Jake blowing up many potholes all over Boise at various times of the night, probably scaring the shit out of the Mormon population that is extremely prevalent in any state that touches Utah.

"I'm not going in to work today, the store is closed." Rusty said.

I got up and started to get dressed, watching the television as I kept passing by the TV on the way to the kitchen and saw when the second plane hit the World Trade Center's second tower. A plane crashed into the pentagon, another landing in a country field.

This wasn't happening. This was literally like some exploitation-tabloid horror flick, and it was very real and I knew that my country would never be the same, and that the world would feel the retaliation. The attack showed to me that yeah, people disliked us Americans. Now we were going to be hated across the board. We already had an idiot who stole the presidency, so I knew anything could happen and it wasn't going to be pretty.

I kind of shut down that day, emotionally. I walked to my work a few blocks away, and retrieved my paycheck. On what would have been a normal busy morning on a major street, I can say that I didn't see one car on the road. With the exception of the occasional dog barking and the obvious birds chirping, the city was dead silent. It was one of the most surreal experiences, because it was broad daylight. No one was outside.

My manager Jessica hugged me, and instead of the usual trailer videos playing for upcoming releases she had on the BBC news on the TV's.

"This isn't going to be pretty for the rest of the world, just you watch. There are going to be targets that have nothing to do with what has just happened, but because they're in the Middle East it isn't going to matter to 'Daddy's little boy."

"Has anyone come in since the store opened?" I asked. It was Tuesday, and I returned the New Releases that I was allowed to have the previous weekend before the rest of the public could rent them and I forgot to return them the night before the store closed. Oddly enough, I can't even recall what films they were.

"Not a phone call. One customer came in very dazed and then turned around and walked out. She sat in her car with her head on the steering wheel."

We made some more small talk, which was odd for us because the two of us loved gabbing with one another. I walked home again to a city that was dead silent, depositing my paycheck in the bank on the way and withdrawing some cash.

I sat down on the couch when I got home, and there was a voice mail message from my friend and hairdresser Aurora canceling the appointment because the salon was closed for the day.

Rusty came out of the shower and saw me scowling and asked what was wrong.

"The country is under attack, it's my day off and I'm going to have to go to a fucking chain barber to get my haircut." I snapped as I puffed away on my cigarette and the phone rang. "This is insane."

It was Jolie, my best friend since I was 14 years old and I hadn't spoken to her since the weekend, before her sister Alisyn got married. I was already pissed at Alisyn for not inviting me to the wedding over her freaking out over a hot-hot pocket microwave snack several years before and my lifestyle, so with everything going on on top of that (ya know, explosions and mayhem in New York and my horrible hair) I didn't want to hear about Alisyn's wedding, especially to one of the most idiotic men I can imagine.

"I can't really talk, I've got to find a barbershop or a chop shop to cut my hair." I told Jolie.

"Well, this is an insane day. Mike and Alisyn's honeymoon is ruined, their flight re-routed them when the attacks happened to Canada and they can't leave." she said. "Alisyn's sad, and of course Mike is being pissy."

Finally, I saw that there was a light at the end of the tunnel and I started laughing...hysterically.

"Oh my God!" I cackled. "On top of EVERYTHING that has happened in the last few hours, this is the best news I've heard today!"

"It's not funny!" Jolie responded.

"I'm 25 years old, and Alisyn is pissed at me for something so stupid that we don't even need to get into right now that happened when I was 20 and she didn't invite me to her wedding because of it." I exhaled an inferno."Believe me, I'll be coasting on this for the rest of the day!"

Jolie let out a sigh. As the one who usually tries not to stir the pot, she just asked me to call her later.

Rusty shook his head and said "You're terrible Muriel." and we got into the car and drove to a cheesy chain salon so I could get my locks off.

The stylist (and I will use the term lightly) tried her best to be cheerful as she cut my hair. I sat in silence and watched the television that was tuned in to (of course, this was Idaho after all) the Fox News station. Over and over I watched those towers collapse, and the smoke billowing from the Pentagon.

I couldn't say anything, because I was numb and I was scared. I didn't feel unsafe that my country was going to blow up at that moment, but because I knew my country was just about to rear it's head. I knew there were going to be even more casualties, and more people losing a loved one. What scared me was that I felt more frightened by my own country then the terrorists at that point.

Today, 10 years later I cannot really say what my exact thoughts

Through the process of the idea of "six degrees of separation" something interesting happened a couple of years later. I worked with a friend of Mark Bingham at The Body Shop in Union Square, of San Francisco. The friend was my manager, named John who set up a little shrine with a Buddha and a burning candle along with a photograph of himself with a couple other friends in a group hug.

One of them was Mark.

The West Memphis 3 - Free At Last

2011-08-22T02:31:00.000-07:00

I cannot really relay how happy I feel for these three guys whom I have always felt were innocent. I highly encourage my international readers to check out the story and the miscarriage of justice that happened in 1993 when 3 teenagers were wrongly arrested, accused, and convicted of a triple homicide of three young boys. The part of the USA where this all took place, is in an area that we call the "Bible Belt", where the Pentecostal movements, the Assemblies of God (speaking in tongues), Southern Baptist, and a little known group of a sect of Christianity very unique to the very poor rural Smokey Mountains known as the Signs Followers. That part of the country has never taken lightly to outsiders and people who are different, thus I have always believed that the hysteria surrounding this case and the lack of DNA and physical evidence linking these men to the crime scene has been one of the most horrible examples of a miscarriage of justice. The men have had phenomenal support from some of the most talented musicians, artists, and actors of our time. New Zealand director Peter Jackson released the following...This is such an awesome day!

Damien Echols, Jason Baldwin and Jessie Misskelley

Released at last!

I'm sorry if you don't know what I'm talking about - but those who do, will no doubt be celebrating along with Fran and myself.

But let's not think for a second that justice was served today. Far from it. Damien Echols, Jason Baldwin and Jessie Misskelley are finally free to get on with their lives after spending 18 years in prison in Arkansas for a crime they did not commit, but I'm finding it very difficult to suppress a deep anger.

Fran and I got up at 3am this morning to watch the live feeds from Jonesboro, Arkansas - we wanted to see Damien, Jason and Jessie walk free. That did happen, but not before we had to sit through a self righteous lecture from Arkansas State Prosecutor, Scott Ellington. Kind of tarnished the joy of seeing them released. I need to vent.

The fight to free the West Memphis Three has been raging for nearly all of the 18 years since their farcical 1994 convictions for the triple murder of three young boys, fueled hugely by the excellent "Paradise Lost" documentary released in 1996. Jason and Jessie were sentenced to life, Damien was sentenced to death.

This morning the State of Arkansas finally released these three innocent men. This was done on the strict condition that they agree the State prosecutors did the right thing in 1993 and their original convictions were in fact, justified. It's called an "Alford Plea", and in theory it allows innocent men to walk free, so long as they are happy to have their convictions stand, and lose any right to claim compensation from the State for wrongful imprisonment.

The last two weeks have been very tense, because the State told the three defense teams that they would consider an "Alford Plea" - but it had to be "all or nothing". All three men had to accept the conditions of the plea - if one refused, they would all stay in prison, probably for another 2 to 3 years, until their inevitable retrial, which would have almost certainly found them innocent. When he received the plea offer, Jason Baldwin refused to accept it. And why the hell should he? He's an innocent man, who has had the last 18 years - half his life - robbed by the State of Arkansas. This was a brave and noble stand by Jason, but it created a very tough time for Damien, and his loved ones.

You see, Damien Echols had to get out of prison, Alford Plea or not. Unlike Jason, Damien has spent the full 18 years on death row. He has not seen sky for over 10 years. He has not had sun on his skin for over 10 years. He is shackled hand and foot whenever he leaves his cell. His eyesight has deteriorated. Look at this morning's press conference - see how Damien has his hand over his mouth? It's because he has severe continual dental pain, and has had for years. On Arkansas death row, the only serious dental care they offer is extraction. No point killing men with nice new crowns. Everyone who knows Damien, has been fearful for his health. He's very weak, and frail - and has limited ability to fight off any infection. Up there in the Varner Unit death row, they don't tend to be as interested in basic medical care as your family doctor.

For several nerve-wracking days, Jason was saying no to the "Alford Plea", but he has been confined in a different, much less severe prison environment and had no contact with Damien. Damien's lawyer wrote to Jason, several friends talked with him. They explained Damien's situation to Jason, and he immediately agreed to change his mind. Jason is a decent guy, and did the right thing for his friend, just as he did many years ago when he was offered a much reduced sentence if he testified against Damien. He refused then - because he knows Damien is innocent, as he is - and he wasn't going to take the bait and sell out his friend. He's been in prison ever since as a result.

Why would you take this "Alford Plea" if you were innocent, if you had a strong possibility that the convictions would be overturned at a retrial? I can answer that - because a retrial would take at least two years, and if the convictions were overturned, the State would likely appeal and the process would drag on for several more years. And all this time you are relying on getting a fair hearing from a State justice system that has not served you well during the last 18 years. Last year you finally get a glimmer of hope when the case is heard by a judge who has no vested interest in the original verdict, but who's to say that judge will still be there in several years time? The whole thing is just too fragile, along with a total lack of trust and belief in the justice system of Arkansas. I know what I would do in their position.

So the "Alford Plea" was entered, and Damien, Jason and Jessie walked free this morning - all that was missing was justice. Justice did not play a role in the proceedings this morning ... not to the 3 men who have been robbed of 18 years, not to the 3 young victims and their families, and certainly not to the people of Arkansas, whom the system is supposed to serve.

There's also a triple child killer who has walked free for the last 18 years ... seemingly an unimportant detail in today's white-washing job.

Back to Scott Ellington, the State's prosecutorial mouth-piece, who lectured the press this morning - take a look, it's online. I'm not going to watch it again, so I can't quote him directly but he managed to state his complete confidence that the three men are indeed the real murderers, and that the State has no intention of further investigation ... whilst also saying that a retrial would likely result in an overturning of the verdicts. Sorry ... how does that actually work? Did I miss something? Compelling evidence of extensive DNA results that were not available back in 1994 ... vastly experienced forensic and scientific experts who were not consulted in 1994 ... prosecution witnesses who now admit they lied under oath back in 1994? Mr Ellington says all that would likely result in a different verdict today, but he still maintains Damien, Jason and Jessie committed these crimes?

And what reasons does Mr Ellington give for Arkansas State not wanting to retry this case - beyond his personal opinion of rampant, evil, satanic worshipping, Stephen King reading, black tee-shirt wearing guilt? Not a lot, but he does refer to the fact that a State Crime Lab employee who specialised in hair and fiber evidence analysis back in 1994 has died in the intervening 18 years. I'm not sure how this hinders the State. He doesn't mention that this very same State employee was very loose with their record keeping, failed to accurately record where key hairs had come from, and submitted questionable analysis, much of which has been rendered redundant by subsequent DNA testing. This same late forensic expert even managed to state that Jason had curious art-work on his bedroom wall - a little outside the forensic brief maybe, but hey, it's good for the team!

It goes on and on ... any serious detailed look into the facts and science of this case quickly reveals what an appalling miscarriage of justice it is. Any vaguely intelligent person would come to the same conclusion, if they take the time - except for Mr Ellington and his justice league. But then, to be fair, Mr Ellington has a job to do, and a good reason to protect his State from admitting any fault. 42 million good reasons in fact. The most telling thing Mr Arkansas Justice Mouth-piece said this morning was that a guy who proved he was wrongfully convicted in another State, was awarded compensation of $14 million.

Follow the money.

What is the price of justice in Arkansas? I don't know, but it seems the price of a miscarriage could be as much as $14 million per person. Or you could look at it another way - investigating and convicting the real killer would cost Arkansas $42m, or $14m for the lives of each of those little boys. A little outside of their "Justice Budget" perhaps? Protect and Serve the people - up to a price?

No, let's not hold our breath for any form of justice in this case.

This "Alford Plea" deal started about three weeks ago, when one of the defense lawyers had a meeting with Arkansas Attorney General, Dustin McDaniel. McDaniel has long expressed his unwavering belief in the original convictions. He has to, of course. But he could arguably have a problem, because the tide of public opinion has been slowly turning in this case and elected officials get nervous when that happens. It helped that this defense attorney was an old law school acquaintance of Dustin McDaniel ... it's easier to talk about stuff among friends.

So congratulations to Dustin McDaniel. It's great he's done this. Good on him! And it will continue to be good for him, should he ever decide to run for Governor of Arkansas. Not that he's thinking of doing that. Who knows? I have no idea. I mean, imagine if this case dragged on for another 2 or 3 years - it could create trouble during a campaign for Governor - for whoever decided to run for next Governor of Arkansas that is. Anybody campaigning for Governor wouldn't want to be stained with a proven miscarriage of justice, should that occur. Especially when the original conviction was largely driven by questionable Arkansas law enforcement and justice department behavior. If that was highlighted by a continuing court case, that would be bad, especially if you were an A.G wanting to run for Governor. But that certainly doesn't apply to Dustin McDaniel because he's done the right thing! Excellent job! For Dustin McDaniel is an honourable man; so are they all; all honourable men.

Hell, I'd vote for Dustin McDaniel. Hang on ... I live in New Zealand, so I can't vote for him - should he ever run for Governor. Damn!

Sir Peter Jackson

August 19th, 2011

"Camping"

2011-08-10T02:30:00.000-07:00

Unlike Liz and her camping trip, I am braving the wilderness of the back yard of Jenn and Justin's tomorrow.

Jolie is picking me up in the afternoon and then we head to the train station to pick up Deandre and Sue and then off to Jenn and Justin's we go.

We haven't gotten together as a group since the trip to the beach house in Washington State last summer so we decided that it would be fun for everyone to camp out on their property out in the woods with all the animals (which we didn't get to have with us last time except for Lily, whom we all know goes NOWHERE without her daddy!) so Abby can of course have a new experience and see everyone as well.

Here's to hoping Sue doesn't annoy the shit out of me this visit, but I only have to be around her about once a year so I think I can manage.

Blerp.

2011-07-30T00:14:00.000-07:00

I know that I am a shitty blogger and keeping up with writing. It made it hard not having access to the internet, but to my devoted little friends that come by and say hello and after I have made my rounds of catching up on other pages, I of course feel it my duty to give a nice long entry about what I am up to. Which probably isn't much. But now I do have wireless in my apartment so for now I am back!

Yes, there have been a few trips here and there, and of course not many pictures to share...if I was as in

Well, my Blythe doll arrived from Hong Kong and I immediately named her Coco.

Jenn sent me an email announcing that my lil baby was waiting for me out in the woods, and after being home a week from last seeing my friends, I was back again to have crafting time again for the dolls. Jenn bought yet another one, bringing her collection to I believe 5, and she has one of which still was in it's original box in the box it was shipped in that she hasn't opened yet. These Blythe collectors do NOT come to play I tell ya! In fact, while I was away I heard that the Blythe doll lovers just had a little“Blythe-Con” here in Portland (probably the only thing ending in CON that I would attend outside of a CON involving cosmetics, if such a thing exists!) in the Pearl District with people from all over the world showing off how much fun they have had with the dolls in changing them up and what not. I doubt I will get that crazy, but the dolls are appealing and I can see why people have gone crazy about them, they are fun and bring out the little girl in us all!

I can see why. The doll is cute, they're creepy, and I like the fact that these dolls have also inspired major fashion designers like Versace, Gucci, and Dolce and Gabanna. Quirky little pieces of pop culture! Plus I just like having something funky and unique that not many people have. We got Coco at an excellent price and she will be very much treasured and around for inspiration.

And wouldn't you know that I have always thought they were cool but what really cinched it is that I knew if I got one it would creep out (and now *BOTH*creeps out and annoys DING DING DING!!!) my friend Debbie, which is always a plus.

On the quick, I made a little hat for one of Jenn's newest Blythe dolls.

So, we had a week of spending our evenings (and down time during the day when Abby was kept occupied by Justin) watching movies and TV shows online in the background and had multiple 'stitch n bitch' sessions together, as I lay in the window seat. Jenn made me a sweet little roll-up case for several of my hooks (I also have some that have bamboo handles for a more comfortable hold that don't fit in addition to some extremely large hooks) made with some adorable fabrics from a Japanese designer (Jenn has a very keen eye for foreign fabric designers and loves nothing more than getting a few yards of something imported that isn't sold here in the states) and a cloth bag to keep my Blythe in (where she now is, in her 'Fort Knox' security boxes). Justin, Jenn, Abby and I got to also work in a couple visits to the beach to see their friends Kelle and Mitch (Kelle and Jenn have been BFF's since they were 11) and Kelle and I also had (they are now deceased) a friend in common at one time. It is interesting how small the world really is.

The 4^th of July was spent at a block party a few streets away, on Debbie's street. Everyone cooked something and my Chicken and Dumplings were a hit, but Jeremy decided to be a skank and bitchily said aloud so everyone could hear, that I made them incorrectly. After I politely told him to fuck off (which means I used profanity with a smile, which is manners coming from my persona) I told him I followed the recipe exactly as Paula Deen published it, every step.

“I wanted to cook something from her recipes and it was the only southern thing that bitch cooks that didn't call for 2 sticks of REAL butter in it to cook the damn shit in!” I snapped. “And all the reviews from the Southern US, said they loved it.” I then gave him a hug and added “You've become so testy since you turned 40 last week, you need more vitamin D. Go hang out in the sun and get some colour, you're looking like Hepatitis.” and walked away.

He laughed and called me a bitch...and I forgave him right then and there for his previous transgression. After all, who else am I going to have daily stitch n bitch time with over tea, a joint, and trashy talk shows on television?

Now that I am home, I have been really been enjoying my crochet time. My learning has come in stages. The end of winter (beginning of the year) I taught myself the basic stitches (slip, single, half double, double, and triple/treble crochet), then I went about applying the newly learned basics in the last couple of months churning out hats from using one particular pattern and experimenting with changing it up (more beanie like for men, more 'tam' like for women and little girls) I finally am getting to play around with more complex stitches.

I'm a visual person, so it is extremely helpful for me to have the DVD's at my disposal as I am of course lacking internet access at the moment to feed my curiosity with questions on a new stitch, but I will say that the DVD's are making it a lot easier for me to read patterns that are written (though the symbol patterns I have a feeling will annoy the crap out of me when that day comes to learn them) down in their proper abbreviations.

Though as helpful as the DVD's have been I do take offense to the horrible music that plays along with the instructions. Not to mention how cheesy the clothes are that the instructors wear, which I think were designed by Helen Keller let loose on a sewing machine. But the music...oh the music! I know this has to be the music that they play for serial killers to torture them whilst they sit on death row...it really does fall into cruel and unusual punishment having to put up with that horrible music!

One woman's polyester blend is one fag's nightmare, I guess!

I will also be the first to admit that my newly acquired addiction has come full circle dozens of times over and I can wholly justify it, of which I now will do.

Now hear me out. Now that I have a new creative outlet (Liz will cry about my makeup bag sitting all lonely. Sometimes at night, I can hear my M.A.C and Urban Decay eye shadows pleading and SCREAMING for attention, so I turn the music up and get down with my crochet hooks like any abusive parent) I do have method to this whole madness.

Same yarn as the hat for Blythe, but I modified the pattern and also the bobble stitch pattern is called a 'Blackberry Salad' and I like the texture it adds. Having so much fun!

People laugh at me when they see not only the yarn that I have amassed in the last few months (which for me still isn't enough!) and my vintage deco cedar chest from earlier photos is stuffed to the brims with yarn of various textiles ( various types of wool and wool blends, some bamboo, soy, acrylic,cotton) and cannot close. Next to the chest are yet more bags of purchased yarns waiting for a new home in my little apartment. I get really excited in thrift stores when there is cool vintage yarn to be bought, which has been fruitful lately!

Then there is the book situation.

Crochet fascinates me in fashion, because even in times when the craft has waned as far as hobbyists in the home, it was still seen on the runways by designers like Marc Jacobs, Gaultier, Vivienne Westwood, and Galliano. I have loved seeing the results that can be made that are unique and unexpected. The fact that a simple stitch can completely change the form of created clothing is awesome, and that is why I crave vintage patterns for clothes to get as reference (but dare a few be remade, some were AWFUL!). I also love the fact that crochet is the only form of needlework that cannot be duplicated in any form, by a machine.

I have several books that are nothing but stitches, stitch patterns of which I now have thousands. Yes, you read right...thousands. These aren't patterns for items per say, just books that show you how to make intricate stitch work to then turn into something (lace, bobbles, etc..)Then of course I have a few books of motifs, embellishments and edging. several pattern books for various clothing ideas, which of course in each book (with the exception of 'Stitch n Bitch: The Happy Hooker') there are horrible examples, but life is all about making changes and believe me I am more than happy to apply them, but also the books do yield a few nice things I could whip up on the cheap and modify. I've also changed my ideas on creating blankets, thinking a crocheted afghan in typical acrylic yarn was just...well, blech. But I have had a lot of fun finding new fibers and patterns that have made me change my mind. My advice to anyone out there thinking about picking up a hook or needles to make a blanket, if you use acrylic make sure it is the softest that you can find, because no one like a scratchy blanket..and Lion Brand and Caron brands are the best for those on a budget.

I got sample issues of all the crochet magazines available, and they all suck of course. I find myself cursing aloud that I cannot believe that people would wear the stuff that people proudly have sent in, not only to show their work....but to offer the pattern for the horrible piece of shit that they got published. It really is painful!

So, I am enjoying the practice and am slowly feeling more confidant in making stuff, so I really hope that my apartment doesn't turn into a craft disaster like some elderly woman living in a retirement home. I now have one of those portable hand held Singer sewing machines. Suddenly the prospect of making curtains easily, sounds like fun...not to mention scary.

Now I am toying with the idea of a dress form, especially after seeing Liz all done up in petticoats for her art show. Why? I have only a few vintage booklets that have really cute dresses in them that would look beautiful on someone like Liz (60's style mod shifts) and I have seen patterns for gorgeous early 1950's lacy crochet dresses. If I am going to make needlework clothing my hobby, I will need a dress form won't I? Liz has several requests from some of the books for a few frocks, and without a dress form I would feel awful sending her a dress where the bodice is where the crotch is supposed to be. So, in order to not embarrass myself, I need one.

In fact when downtown at Pioneer Square a few weeks ago where they had DJ's spinning music into the night, I met up with Tyson and his wife Leanne (Tyson is Justin's brother) and of course there I was behind the DJ stage as Ty was close friends with the DJ from Los Angeles, and bobbing my head and hooking away on a project to the music...granny at the rave! Jesus, I had NO idea that this is what my life would be like at 35.

Summer in Oregon has been a dream. I mean that in the sense that it would be a dream if we had summer. Usually the rain pans out and we have days of scattered showers here and there, through June.

No such luck, las Saturday was the first lovely day with some warmth that we have had yet. The days since have been 50/50. SO annoying! Warm but not too hot...not like I would know, my climate controlled apartment (by moi) is always 60 degrees year round.

Debbie and I took Lola and Lily to the dog park, which is always a comical trip. Both dogs get extremely yappy and vocal because they know the direction of the park and once we turn the corner and they see the park, oh my GOD do they get obnoxious, which just makes me laugh. Lola, being the black Labrador is the loudest. The park is lovely because it has 3 sections, 2 for larger dogs and one for smaller dogs all fenced in. We put both of them in the section for the larger dogs where there aren't as many playing around, so Lola can really get going when we play fetch. That dog LOVES to play fetch, and it is awfully cute watching little Lily close on her heels as she tries to steal the ball from Lola. Saturday was especially entertaining for Lola because there was a HUGE mud puddle over by the water faucets and bowls for the dogs and of course due to her breed, just plops right into the puddle...happy as a pig rolling around in shit.

The girls playing fetch at the park. Lily looks like the little girl from the Exorcist.

And of course because she had the tennis ball in her mouth, Lily jumped into the puddle with her (and I'm sure Liz by now is laughing because she knows how annoyed I get when my lily white Shih-Tzu named Lily, gets dirty...as if I forget she is only a canine) which of course horrified me, but I of course was too distracted by all the other dogs in the park and had to of course go around to meet and pet all of them. I of course fell in love with a Boxer named George. I love all dogs seriously, but certain types within certain bloodlines always get to me...and I am very fond of all sorts of terriers (also known as terrors). I have a flip through the photographs of all the times I have house sat for people with all their dogs so I can have a smile. I'll be printing them up soon so my fridge will be covered with them: Smithers (whom I called Smitty) the people hating rescue chihuahua that I won over in 2 days and his brother/humping victim a lab named Sammy whom I took care of 2 summers in a row out in the woods, the Jack Russell named Spencer that was abandoned in my building that I found a home for after fostering him Lily, Lola, various cats both passed on and alive, Liz's dogs Maggie and Molly...none of these animals except Lily are mine...I'm crazy, what can I say?

Now to figure out what to curl up with and watch on Netflix, while I work on the hat.

Good to be back as always! xo

What Kind of Fuckery is This? RIP Amy Winehouse

2011-07-23T16:04:00.000-07:00

I'm sad/ 

It's sad she's gone. I had always hoped that she would have gotten herself together, she had such an amazing voice. I never thought the media did anything to help her with her problems.

"Amy's a mess" or "Amy on drug binge" when did it end? She was the first British female to win 5 Grammy's and paved the way for Adele and Duffy...

She's now sitting at the bar with Jimi Hendrix, Janis Joplin, Kurt Cobain....it just really saddens me. They all passed away at about the same age. I always hoped she would get clean and sober...that voice, haunts me.

I was eagerly awaiting her 3rd album...now we will never know.

'I died a thousand times...you go back to her and I go back to black....'

Yes Yes

2011-07-22T15:04:00.001-07:00

I know, am a horrible blogger. I have a long entry to publish soon! xo

Home

2011-06-21T01:27:00.000-07:00

I'm going home in the afternoon and I am excited that I will be driving back with my OTHER friend named Jenn, who is on her way home to Washington state.

Every time I am here at Jenn and Justin's house for a visit, we always extend it and have lots of fun out and about...doing a little shopping.

Now with Abby in tow, it is a whole new set of adventures!

I took a bunch of pictures which I will post later this week, but I wanted to let you all know I have joined the Blythe doll cult, and have bought the doll model on the left called 'Simply Chocolate'. I am in awe of the bargain I got her for new and she is an authentic one as well. But I cannot WAIT to have her! They're just the most bizarre little dolls!

Anywhoo, it will be nice to go home.

Toots and Snails and Puppydog Tails....

2011-06-13T17:43:00.000-07:00

How lovely the country shows off my pedicure! I am wearing 2 shades from OPI for Sephora: Slushied (limited edition tie in to the show 'Glee') and for the crackle effect (which you cannot really see too well, but I will say the product ROCKS!) the product OPI for Sephora Blasted Black. They will soon be releasing a nice little collection of different blasted effects, right now you can get black, gold and silver. More to come and I give them my stamp of approval!!

Check out this delightful and shameless product plug!

Well, as requested and I have followed through, follows some snapshots for ya all!

Abby is including me in all her daily activities and we have had a lot of fun playing. I just can't wait until she's old enough to be interested in something entertaining like a Barbie or a Bratz or something (Well, to hold my short attention span) doll wise like that. No, I don't want her to have an eating disorder, just fun accessories!

(the next post will deal with my near meltdown over a doll...yes a grown man!)

Abby also likes to fart and after she rips one she giggles and then blurts out an enthusiastic "TOOOOOT! So funny! Before I came to visit, she told Jenn that she was "Going to toot on Jackie and Lily when I see them." That little girl has a LOT to say!

Jenn and I have had a few Stitch n Bitch sessions, watching movies and doing our projects: she's working on a quilt and as you can see by her collection of fabric that follows, you will see she takes her duties seriously! I have been working on crochet, and the other day acquired a few new books of patterns and stitches (more more more!) and of course some nice natural fiber yarns and wool and bamboo blends of yarn by Debbie Stoller's Stitch Nation that were on sale at the place we visited. Deb has a few books out for those of us who like to knit and or crochet, and she has some pretty cute and modern patterns in her books. Just not a fan of the patterns on the website.

I also got to go pick up my meds from my medical marijuana grower and I am beyond satisfied and happy. I think when I get back home, I am going to talk to my doctor to see if we can gradually move my HIV meds to be taken during the day time, for the fact that I think my insomnia is linked to my HIV meds because I never really had a problem with insomnia until I started that cocktail. But, the green herb I picked up is delicious and helpful. Nice to walk around all day perma-grinned!

The highlight of going to my grower's house, is that he lives across the highway from the ocean, which puts him basically in a tsunami zone. Though he is mildly shielded in vision by trees and forest in his little locale, but still close to the ocean nonetheless, and a few miles away from the closest town. So, when we arrive, he isn't home. To make a long story short, my bowels kicked in and I couldn't wait for him to show up after he let us know he is on his way home and I have this problem where I absolutely DETEST having to use someone elses restroom. I have no idea why, maybe I am scared of what noises may happen...maybe I want to be left in alone in peace...well, I am sure you can imagine me stomping and swearing to myself down a deserted coastal road trying to find an in to the trees with a ditch for myself. I have never had to do that before and I hope to never again.

Anywhoo, here's a photo drop for ya!

Abby found this snail on one of the many walks we took.

Sticker book time with Daddy and you know who.

Jenn surrounded by bliss: quilts, comfy pillows, her Granny's couch with a slipcover, an some animals asleep on her.

As anyone knows when I come to visit, a Yorkshire Pudding is requested and I made a pork loin roast, gravy, the puddin' and that blob on the far left is the butter I made from fresh cream while the pudding was cooking.

Mmmmmm PUDDIN'!

Happy waggin' tails.

A view of some of the property my friends live on.

Flowers everywhere! Wild ones and flowers in planters.

I couldn't believe how tall and big the Queen Anne's lace was on my walk. I felt like Alice!

The little joker.

Thats the homosexual dog Benson to the left and to the right is Maty, a sweet and lovely kitty I have known since she was a baby, who is 17 years old. Still cuddly and sweet.

Yet another reason I love coming to visit...a vintage propane stove...of course I am in heaven.

Abby invited Lily and I on a picnic in the back yard.

My new messenger bag that I can finally carry my projects in and even when I am standing and waiting for the bus, I can still crochet. THANK GOD!

Hey girl!

Oh how it saddens me that the people living down the tracks from them, have relocated to Portland and renting out their house. I should be living down the road from Abby, Jenn and Justin. 2 summers in a row I housesat just a stone's throw from my besties house.

The chateau.

Jenn is making napkins. I love the fabric.

Lily and the new kitty Mabel, being all lovey.

Ok, for my friends who like to sew...the following pics are of the sewing room which contains only the fabric, there is more to this madness than meets the eye.

She's crackers I tell you! Quilting is an obsession! But I understand, I am the same way all of a sudden now about crochet.

Her fabulous sewing machine made by Brother...which is a limited edition tie in to the next picture which features the name of a show....

One of the coolest sewing machines ever!

Ahhh this is the life!!

Crochet in the window seat....

Too bad that Lily is fixed...she and Benson would have had cute puppies...but then again, Benson is quite the 'mo, I am sure he wouldn't know where to put it!

New kitty Murray...sweet boy! He has a motor on him like you wouldn't believe. Purr!!!

Mabel is also a new kitty. Lily has been in heaven instigating playtime with these two!

Holiday...

2011-06-10T18:07:00.000-07:00

Oh it is a lovely visit out here.

I have taken some pictures and will post them soon. I have a little 3 year old girl who is keeping me busy!

Forest Fun

2011-06-06T16:51:00.000-07:00


My little niece loves her 'Aunt Jackie' (nickname I have had for 20 years) on the bridge over the river that runs through their property. The bridge is actually the bottom of an old boxcar train. Abby enjoys throwing rocks into the river.

It is so nice being out here in the quiet of the woods.

Abby is such an entertaining little girl. She's wanted to include me in everything she's doing, informs me about her success in playing in her sticker books and puzzles, and doesn't seek my consent in the slightest when she wants to go for a walk and announces to Mum and Dad that "Aunt Jackie and I are going for a walk!"

How can I say no to the little boss?

We've gone on walks and played with the animals. Lily is having a lot of fun playing with Abby and the 2 new cats in the house are teasing her for play and headbutting her affectionately. I love being able to go on a walk with her off leash completely away from the hustle and bustle of the city.

More to come, I have to work on some sort of glitch on my laptop. The wireless on here kind of phases in and out if there is another computer in use on wireless too. Never have had a problem before connecting and maintaining that connection. Odd...but once I figure out the problem, more pics will be coming!

A Few More Days...

2011-05-29T21:56:00.001-07:00

Looking forward to leaving for the coast on Friday.

As per usual, I am house-sitting right now. Nothing new to report this holiday weekend!

Crochet and the Rapture

2011-05-23T16:53:00.000-07:00

And here is a sample of all the hats I have been making. The one on the far right in a rainbow of colours is one Liz specifically requested in that yarn and it turned out beautifully.

So, I spent a good portion last evening working on yet another hat. Yes, I cannot stop talking about it, doing it, looking at it, thinking about it...it's like puberty ALL over again where when ya discover something that gives you pleasure, ya aint gonna stop until you're satisfied, blind, or both.

When I was in Seattle, Liz had requested that one of her hats that I was working on have a colour change for the last row. No problem, it can be done. I just want it to look right.

“Well, why can't you just attach the new yarn to the end of your row and make a knot with one colour to the new one?” she asked.

I was getting frustrated with the hat because I used the appropriate needle size that the label on the yarn called for, but not for the pattern and it was taking MUCH longer than I had hoped (wanting to have a photo shoot with her in the hat) and the damn seam was driving me bonkers as it wasn't looking right and I couldn't hand over something and say “Here, from the bottom of my heart.” having it look that way.

“Go choose a colour from what I have and I'll make the change, but there is an appropriate way to do it and to just tie it off like that wouldn't look right and I am annoyed with that seam as it is. There is a proper way for it to be done, and I would rather learn that way than just 'cheat' by doing it any other way.”

My dear friend had stars in her eyes, reflected by the crazy colours her hat. She had to have it in her clutches.

“Why not?” she asked. Exactly what I would have asked had I been in her shoes with a brightly coloured accessory in view, that was in the works and not finished as the spot on my collar from the saliva grew bigger.

“I won't do it.”

My explanation didn't make sense, I guess. As she kept asking why, which is EXACTLY what I would have done. I held firm as to my conviction that I was going to do it the correct way, so she was going to have to wait. But it was worth it in the end.

But pissy attitude on my part be damned, I finished that hat and am very happy with it! Now she'll have to wait until the cold weather returns to wear it. All the more reason why I need to learn more stitches, and do different pattern samples because I don't want to limit myself to just hats.

Many people wonder how I spend my afternoons. Well, with the weather being so rainy for winter and spring (summer is almost here, I can see it reflected in sunsets) Jeremy and I spent a few hours a day, smoking our medical grade pot and having on vintage TV in the background. Oh how I wish they would show a few old Britcoms, like: Faulty Towers, Girls On Top, Are You Being Served? But. Away he and I have our needles swirling around thread for hours on end, enjoying what we're making.

Why, just the other morning when I dropped off Lily at the groomer I noticed she had a basket with a crochet project she was working on, hook in the fabric. I commented that I just recently learned and when I picked Lily up that afternoon I took her a crochet project kit that I had gotten 2 of the same (2 skeins in each kit of beautiful yarn and a pattern book for the project in knit or in crochet), as her tip and she was thrilled at the set for it: a scarf, mitts, and hat all very hip in style.

“My daughter and granddaughter have NO interest in learning. My great-grandma taught me when I was a little girl, having lived through 2 wars. It's so nice to see young people learning it, especially guys. My granddaughter will especially love this when I make it for when she moves to Alaska for college!” she said excitedly.

“Oh, we're not a rare breed. Lots of guys do it, and it's been on the news. I've known many men over the years that have.” I informed her cheerily as I thanked her and took my yapping baby out of the shop (having survived a 4 hour assault by someone she visits every 2 months, Lily puts up quite a fuss when I show up) and off we walked.

So, I am curious as to what my readership was doing during the rapture that was supposed to happen on Saturday. Obviously that idiot minister in California can't count. The world was supposed to end when I was 18 in 1994 according to his last claim.

And here I am...still bitchy.

Take that, Jesus!

(uh oh, did I just 'punk' the almighty?)

Month Old Snapshots and.....

2011-05-22T16:36:00.000-07:00

Josh, Liz and I the morning after they got home from the islands.

Probably my fave pics of the trip. Liz and I had just woken up. Look how pretty she looks!

Aunt Kissy surrounded by the dogs...hog heaven for me. Oh look, there's Josh.

I flicked Josh SO much shit for his outfit.

The girls all spying on something.


This picture is a month old. I have more yarn and have made even more hats! This chest is stuffed full!

Corinne looking fabulous as always, and Lily having to be in the middle of it all. I painted her face.

So, as you can see by the paltry amount of photos, that I enjoyed myself in Seattle. You would think that for a person who was there for nearly 3 weeks would have produced much more outstanding results. But alas, I have already accepted the fact that no one can out do Liz when she is armed with her camera, so I guess people have to settle for words!

So, I am already planning on my little trip south to see my little Abby along with her parents Jenn and Justin. I about teared up, when Jenn told me that she missed her Grandma and “my Aunt Jackie and Lily.” which is just about the sweetest thing I have ever heard. Aunt Jackie being the nickname I have had for nearly 20 years, so to be actually called that and thought of that by that little girl just warms my heart. Jenn says we have a budding little craft lover on out hands. Ever since she could walk, she has always had fun at the fabric store and especially loves the sewing/craft chain stores like Michael's and Joann. I hear she also was curious watching her Mommy crochet and likes to be around her when she's sewing too. I of course cannot go down there and see her without bringing her something, which usually is books or some educational toy or a DVD. Now with my quest to create crochet couture, she will sure be the inspiration to want to make things. When I call on the phone, I love listening to her talk in the background. She hasn't talked to me on the phone yet, but I get informed when she says she wants me to come visit.

Jeremy, happily hooking...oh my, is that his medical marijuana vaporizer on his table?

The book that Liz found me for a vintage bikini, well it turns out that it wasn't a pattern. But I did find this 1971 Betsey Johnson pattern in a book, I will modify the bust part of the bikini, the cups are WAY too 1990's Madonna 'Blonde Ambition Tour', not to mention Liz would kill me if I sent her a bikini with a bust like that!

The candle I lit for Aunt Lita at the grotto. I miss her already. I took it upon myself to use a candle depicting my favourite sighting of the Virgin Mary in Latin America.

Did Ya Miss Me?

2011-05-21T19:47:00.000-07:00

Well everyone, I'm back!

So this is a long and overdue blog entry, but it isn't going to be insane…well, it is me after all.

Ok.

The past month has kept me busy and also in thought.

My next door neighbour, who was the first person I met when I moved into this building, passed away from liver and kidney failure. He was an insomniac like myself, and was always making something or working on something. Victor was also the caregiver to his brother Randy, who was battling HIV and Hepatitis C. It took Randy 2 years to get well. Then all of a sudden, Victor got sick.

Without going into detail, let me just say that a dying person who spent his life paying into this 'dream' that every flag waver yaps about...why couldn't he have medical coverage?

He was in the hospital last Christmas with a severe infection, and I brought him a Christmas basket with cookies and snack mix. And for those of you who know my baking abilities, you all know I like to add something special for those in need, if you know what I mean!

He passed away on Easter Sunday. I miss visiting with him, and I check in on Randy (who has recovered from his illness, but this is the second brother he has lost in a year) who as a salt of the earth guy, just goes to work and comes home and is busy clearing out lost belongings of Victors. I think I need to learn to make him some kind of lap quilt.

I had a wonderful time in Seattle, and I really enjoyed my time with Liz, Josh, and Corinne. The usual sidekicks: Lily, Maggie and Molly (aka Bear Cub) were also an added treat.

Waking up in the mornings to Maggie looking at me and wanting to crawl into bed, is something that I still miss. Lily had an absolute blast, and she wouldn't have had half as much fun had Molly not been there. Those two were inseparable and provided me with lots of entertainment.

Of course, getting to spend quality time with Liz was the best. For two people who have short attention spans, we managed to keep on track of doing what we do best: on a mission and hunt for something (shopping), Liz taking pictures, Liz and I cattily bickering with one another the only way dear friends (and opposite sexed gay men) can do. Why, we even shed tears together right before she left for Hawaii because she was hormonal and on her period (and then add me to the mix, that can be taxing on a uterus of any age or race) when we discussed events in our past.

Love that girl!

Corinne of course was not there nearly enough for my liking (nor was Josh) but when all of us were together, it was a lot of fun. Josh and Liz make such the adorable and fun couple, it's just like an old friend when he's around...just like Justin. It's like when I visit Jenn and Justin and Justin is working all day, I miss his presence and his voice of reason. And with two crazy shitheads like Liz and I...someone has to be there to stick us out on the naughty step once in awhile! It doesn't feel like 'family night' when Josh isn't playing on the turntables and Liz and Corinne are hooping all around the living room.

But all the trips to little shops, thrift stores, yarn stores...Liz is like Warhol, she has the camera in her hand at all times and snapping away. I never think to do that. But as you can see, I did get a couple.

She even made me a FABULOUS bag to carry a LOT of yarn in (as I scored a lot up there mucking about). I was super excited, because I haven't ever had anything she's sewn before in the nearly 12 years I have known her. So, the bag was a the end to a wonderful visit. I loved watching her at work, and admired her concentration.

When I got home, I created my crochet station an a vintage union made cedar chest (the inside is in immaculate condition...the outside can be easily refinished) that is OVERFLOWING with pattern books, stitch manuals, needles and thread, crochet hooks, and a shit TON of yarn. In fact, I am buying more and more all the time (just to have around as I seriously have gone in head first and hellbent into making as many caps in one pattern so I get it down perfectly. Seriously, until I complete the project to my satisfaction and I am happy with the results, I will find every way possible to make them to my standards!) and more room is needed already. Jenn informed me that she has more yarn (tail wags!) and some pattern books for me that she found (I'm howling at the moon!).

As usual, I don't have many snapshots of my trip because I didn't have a working laptop.

And now I do!

Several days ago, my litigation was settled...and I was able to do some electronics shopping that I have been needing and got excellent prices on what I wanted, except we all know that an iPod never goes on sale below 5 bucks. But I was able to get a nice speaker setup docking station which was the display unit (money off) and also on clearance (more money off). It suits the purpose for a studio apartment.

The most exciting purchase, was the laptop. I got a Toshiba 4G, 500GB, HD DVD. I'm happy. What made it exciting, was that it was a returned purchase where the box had been opened. The computer itself had never been used. So, 100.00 was taken off the price, which enabled me to apply that towards that marvelous docking station.

So, I have been playing with my new toys. I am SO thankful for computer nerds who post videos on how you can get into your old iPod to extract the music files. I hadn't saved anything music wise on my old laptop, so my old iPod contained all my music. 30GB, the highest at the time that model was made. So, I am extremely happy that I was able to move my library onto my new iPod classic. I wish I could say how many times that I have mourned with my older one, the times I wanted to add new music and had to go through my music library only to have to to delete some music to make room for new. Now, I can spend the rest of my life filling up the new iPod! I've downloaded a bunch in addition to my old library and it hasn't even made a dent...how delightful. Anyone who knows me, can tell you that while I do enjoy quiet, I value music and a large diverse selection of it at my fingertips.

Windows 7 is light years ahead of Vista. It came with a bare bones version of Microsoft Office, which I have never really been a fan of. So, I installed the office suite from Openoffice.org and voila! The one thing I can say that I did like about my old laptop after I reinstalled a bare bones operating system (linux/ubuntu) was that it had Open Office on there and had everything on it I would need to keep notes on etc, and not have to deal with some annoying Microsoft program.

I have been planting flowers and herbs like mad: I had a random seed mixture and some unnamed flower packets a friend gave me, and Jeremy and I went crazy. A courtyard where any spot that the sun hits, will be popping with flowers of dozens of different types, all into the summer. We just ran out there one afternoon after a 'Stitch n Bitch' crochet session whilst watching 'Maude' and 'Good Times' and I said “We've gotta go outside and plant flowers! It's killing me!”

So, off we ran into the courtyard with gardening tools and the mission was accomplished.

I took over a nice raised flower bed, that has a bench attached in the courtyard and planted french lavender, catnip, basil, rosemary, Greek Oregano, mint, and one called Savory Summer (I thought it was Rosemary when I bought it). I'm looking forward to cooking as usual!

I've started back on my modeling interviews. I just did the first half of an interview with a lovely woman by the name of Andrea Malckiewicz, who was discovered by the same model scout who found Kim Alexis. These models all have such wonderful wit, and Andrea and I love a lot of the same comedy, so I knew I didn't have to behave myself so much in what flew out of my mouth. I made her laugh, and she stuck with me...so I must have some sort of gift! Andrea and I have been Facebook friends ever since the whole project was thought up, and well before the interviews, she's communicated so friendly towards me.

I just got an email from my mother that my great Aunt Lita just passed away. Bless her. I emailed my mother and asked if I could have her perfume bottles. Lita always smelled like Estee Lauder's perfume, Youth Dew. Not a scent that can be carried off, as it is extremely strong. But, ever since the perfume hit the market (and in those days, she was living in Guam and it was sold originally as a bath oil and then women began to wear it as perfume) she has always put a very tiny drop on her wrists and some on her neck, and it has been her trademark. She always was the glamorous one in the family. I last saw her during the holidays, and Lily sent her a card with her picture in it for her fridge (My Aunt always loved lapdogs, and my mother's senior dog, her Shih-Tzu Heidi, has lost one of her best friends in Lita) the beginning of spring, which got a card addressed from 'her favourite Aunt' (as she would always ask every little kid in the family, knowing she was).

Now I worry about my Grandmother being all alone, as they lived in the same retirement community.

My mother said that it was sudden and she didn't suffer. Goodness, nearly 90 years old! What a lovely woman she was, and full of the same German spunk my Grandpa had. Sadly at her request, as far as my mother recalls she didn't want any services.

So, this afternoon I went and lit a candle for her at the grotto.

Peaceful end to a busy week, I must say. It was quite pretty there today.

And shit...my wi-fi connection at this cafe is too weak to post the pics...oh well, next time!

Finally!

2011-05-11T20:53:00.000-07:00

I have a new laptop and iPod!!! Thank God, as I was going to go nuts. Give me a day or two to get it set up and I will be back to blogging and terrorizing in no time :) xo

R.I.P Poly Styrene

2011-04-26T14:59:00.000-07:00

Another legend bites the dust....

Porn N Puddin'!

2011-04-15T01:08:00.000-07:00

Good times!

So, Liz and I had a little gabfest as we critiqued the above porn classic. I made Yorkshire Puddings as we had planned this for ages, and since we couldn't watch 'Edward Penishands' as the version she found online had no sound, we were stuck watching this classic.

Survey says?

Some of the costumes were fun, and you can see the influences it had on Kubrick for the film Eyes Wide Shut.

Marilyn Chambers doesn't say one word in the film. It is also the first film to feature interracial sex and sexuality.

The whole time Liz complained about how the girls needed to at least 'trim the bacon strips' but to not make a clean shave. One quote she blurted was "Enough of this muff diving, I need to see some penetration!"

In the end, she says she'll stick to her gay porn to arouse herself when needed!

Fag and Hag : A Love Story

2011-04-11T02:25:00.000-07:00

So, Liz took me to meet her in-laws at an Italian foodie place not too far from where this pic was taken. Then we made a quick stop into the trashiest Joann Fabric/Craft store where I made a beeline to the yarn department. I had NO idea that Liz had been treated rudely by a few of the sales associates. otherwise I would have gladly charmed them with my wit and acidic tongues. The nerve of some people, raining on our parade of laughter and fun.

There is NO place for rudeness in a craft store!

2 of the nuttiest people you will ever meet.

All Is Well

2011-04-08T01:24:00.000-07:00

So late tomorrow night, Liz and Josh should be landing in Seattle from their holiday in Maui.

Liz called a few times and said she was having a wonderful time. Corinne even came over for a few days to keep me company and keep me entertained (which she always does).

I feel like a total slag. I was supposed to knock out some crochet projects, and I did crochet a hat which drove me up the wall, due to the imperfections of the seam which of course has been my original complaint ever since I started. I have a feeling that Liz is going to be extremely disappointed that something wasn't made for her, but if I make something for someone and I give it to them, it has to be nice and not look shoddy which the damn joining stitch in the rows continually does. I'd have been better off making a scarf! I'll just wait until I get home and go to the HIV+ crochet group they have for men, to see what kind of pointers I can get. Jeremy is only so much help, but he does free-form and hasn't made a hat.

It has been nice, this quiet week that they have been gone with the dogs. But, I would be foolish to say that I wasn't feeling just a tad alone, because unlike the other times I have house sat for people and their animals, I was able to just walk over to a friends' house (i.e. Jenn and Justin's house) to keep myself entertained. Not that I was bored, the dogs kept me entertained.

Oh well.

Liz will have lots of stories and about a zillion pictures to go through, like any tourist.

At least we have a few days before I go home to do something crazy, and she won't be on her 'moon time' (hopefully by now she is pregnant!) so we can have a little fun. She said she wanted me to extend my stay by a few days, but I should really get home before too too long. No complaints, we'll see when she gets home what she wants to do. It will be nice to have another voice around the place!

Yay! Pudding!

2011-04-04T20:52:00.000-07:00

After spending a few days by myself here in Seattle, Corinne is finally coming to spend a couple of her days off from work with me to keep me entertained. It wouldn't be so bad if my cell phone wasn't one of those disposable ones that a crack dealer can buy for a few minutes and then dump, for a small minimal price. The minutes cost a lot and it is a rip off. Luckily, I have unlimited text messages!

So, after my tempting her with dinner waiting for her she said she would be coming over and is on her way here. Sadly, I hate to say that the bus system in this state outside of Seattle is a fucking joke. Each suburb has their own line of transit and they're a pain. Where I live in Portland, we have (according to the US News analysis) the #1 transit in the nation. With constant streetcars, light-rail trains, and excellent buses you can get to the burbs in a fraction of the time. If I traveled the same distance as Corinne, if I was home I would be there in about 30 minutes. Here, having to come from North Seattle to where I am, she'll be here pretty late, the poor thing!

So, because I love and adore the woman...I am cooking up a roasted turkey breast...AND Yorkshire Puddings. What can I say? Liz, Josh, and Corinne fell in LOVE with Yorkshire Pudding the last time I was here when I cooked them...3 times I had to cook them! Twice for dinner, and then Liz demanded them one night so she could smother them in fresh berries, whipped cream, and some kind of syrup...all to her hearts content. I knew all I had to do was dangle a dinner in front of her face, and she'd bite. We were roommates once, years ago after all and we always enjoyed cooking with one another. So, I knew that after a hard days working, if she hopped the bus and got a little rest...coming into a house with happy dogs and food a cookin', she'd be happy. I was right!

I'm so glad Corinne is coming over, she'll keep me entertained for the days that she is here. Then she and I can crochet together and have ourselves a good old fashioned Stitch n Bitch! Having her here to watch the instructional DVD's will be a lot more entertaining, because we can not only bitch about our frustrations as we stitch away, but we can marvel at the ugly outfits the instructors wear, the HORRIBLE music playing in the background (I think they tapped the market on what constipation sounds like!), and our trying to figure out projects. Corinne just started to learn, so I am glad I have a friend in cahoots!

On a lighter note, I know I talk about her a LOT...and yes, I am sure their talent is questionable. But I seriously LOVE this russian pop band called NikitA. One of the girls was the 55th Anniversary playmate for Playboy magazine, the first Eastern european to have that honor, and she has REAL boobs and dark hair! She's the girl in the red dress in the video (Dasha), but I must say that finding 2 girls who could literally be twins was brilliant. Very sexy, and I LOVE the masks in the video. Each video of theirs has some costume piece or makeup idea that inspires me!

Seattle Legends, Sainthood, and Louise Brooks

2011-04-03T00:20:00.000-07:00

Getting in the spirit of being in Washington State, I re-read one of the few books on famed Seattle resident Frances Farmer.

There is something about the Pacific Northwest, that is so bizarre. I noticed it as I was on the train, getting deeper into the state on my way towards Seattle. Beautiful yes, but there is something that lurks in the energy of this area of the country that produces some pretty interesting cases. Well, 2 of the most notorious serial killers in American history came from here: Ted Bundy and the Green River Killer. Kurt Cobain killed himself in Seattle and grew up and Aberdeen, not too far from Olympia.

Yet I find myself so drawn to Frances, and I have for many years. A rebellious girl, who survived being institutionalized for not wanting to tow the line in Hollywood and a mother who wanted all the glamour her daughter was surrounded by, but not impressed with.

Having fought and won my own battle with major depression and drug addiction, I guess someone needs to correct all of these assumptions made about Frances Farmer, and the fact that they say she had a lobotomy. No records in the state hospitals support that claim, and the doctor who was the "King" of performing them (he turned a Kennedy family member into a vegetable, after her parents couldn't deal with her defiant mood swings) by the name of Walter Freeman, kept extensive records.

Can I help that I never knew the woman, and yet having done so much research into mental illness on so many levels that I feel somewhat protective of her? I can see why to people who suffer from the hands of psychiatrists that she is a patron saint of the mentally ill. Yet I do not believe that she was ever sick. I believe that in the 1930's, a woman who was strong minded and strong willed, was a major threat to the masturbating studio heads.

All I was looking for was a nice photo of her, and then the page I got it from claimed that infamous lie about her and it just infuriates me to read an unsupported claim that she had such an operation. What she did endure were nearly 100 insulin shock treatments, hydro therapy, and electro-shock treatments. The 2 different shock treatments were enough to cause the brain damage and the change in her behaviour as someone who was rather mellow and considered cured by the standards of that time. Oh it just pissed me off! I couldn't help writing a nasty letter to the webmaster saying that to repeat an unsupported claim like that is murder on her memory. How awful, that a person so talented will forever be remembered as someone who was supposedly troubled, when all she wanted was to be left alone and to actually act in films that had value and not the fluff she kept getting, and still to this day people focus on that damn operation that has been proven NEVER happened. Even her own supposed autobiography was proven to have been elaborated on by a ghost writing friend. Further adding to her mysterious story.

When Liz gets back, I want to see the house where she grew up and leave some flowers. Can't help it, I am just that type of person!

The animals here are having a lot of fun. Watching Lily take on the big dogs is entertaining. Maggie and Molly pouted when Liz and Josh left for most of the day, but I can say that nothing tickles me more than being in bed with the dogs. Maggie insists on sleeping on the bed with Lily and I, and I can't so no. I haven't really done much since they left, just read a lot (and obviously got pissed off in the process) that I have to resolve to reading a book about my favourite actress of all time....

Louise Brooks. I read Barry Paris' biography on Louise many years ago and it was high time to reread it. Liz even has the original copy after all these years that I "forgot" to return to a library in San Francisco (I'm sure there is a warrant out for my arrest, as some states have been known to do that for an overdue library book! But who cares, this one was a keeper!) so I have been spending time in absolute silence, with dogs all around me in bed, rereading a book about the women that I most love and adore.

Goodness, I cannot ever get enough of my Brooksie!

The computer I am using is rather old, so I am trying to figure out how to post the pictures that I have already taken from my trip, so I will have to wait until Liz calls me to figure out how it works. But nonetheless, I have been enjoying my solitude and the unconditional love and cuddles from all of the sweet dogs I am looking after. Waking up in bed to Molly and Lily cuddled with me, why it just brings a smile to my face.

Hope all is well with all my folks in bloggerland!

Liz still has 3 days/entries of pics up from before she left for Hawaii. The trip to the porn shop yielded the BEST "gag" (pun intended and not intended!) gift of them all! You even get to see me in my native environment: a makeup shop and my upset at the Christian Dior display..and finally redemption!

Ciao babes!

SEATTLE!!!!

2011-03-30T01:29:00.000-07:00

(Pic from Google...I WISH the weather was this nice today! But if you live in the UK, you would feel at home here!)

Hello! I made it to Seattle.

I will be house-sitting for Liz, starting on April 1st, but she takes more pictures than Warhol...so while we're off being crazy, treat yourselves to Liz's fabulous blog. I can say, that in the last 24 hours...MANY things have gone down as entertainment: my cooking, shopping in adult shops for tassles, trips to makeup boutiques, porno classic chic inspired energy drinks (seriously, check her blog for the pics...I about shit myself when I bought it!)...dancing to great music...laughter...

Hopefully we'll be making obscene anonymous phone calls at some point! xoxoxo

R.I.P Elizabeth Taylor

2011-03-23T12:09:00.000-07:00

I don't know what else to say. I am actually crying right now. I just found out. More later.

Tee Hee

2011-03-22T13:30:00.000-07:00

Just a few more days and then off to Seattle to housesit for Liz.

I cannot wait! I am sorry that this blog has fallen by the wayside, but I haven't a computer at the moment and am waiting to buy another one.

Hope all is well my dears! xooxo

At Last...INTERCOURSE!

2011-03-11T17:26:00.000-08:00

I knew that would catch ya, ya pervs!

(oh and for the people on here who get so annoyed at perfect puncutation, please forgive me as this entry is a copy from another format and even though it shows in pre published form as normal, it isn't publishing normally the way it should, so cut me some slack!)

In retrospect,this month has been touch and go as far as events. Maybe touch and go, but
perhaps a roller coaster of thoughts and worldwide events that snag your
attention. I'm multitasking a few projects (yay!) and finally am writing it all
down for ya.

So, umm...it's kinda long as I am prone to do when it has been awhile since I had a decent
post. So for those who are into a rather long read, grab a glass of wine and for those who just skim this blog...on your mark...get set...GO! There are even a few pics!

The unrest and utter madness in Libya, the earthquakes in Christchurch where lives have been
lost (though luckily, my blogfriend Helga Von Trollop was safe, and enjoying a
glass of red to calm her nerves, and already thinking about what frock she
should don to survey the damage and bring some flash and spirit to the city. I
give props to my interaction with people and their blogs in the UK and
Australia. She and her man G are helping friends get their homes back in
shape...that is so kind! I wish I could deliver a pizza to them!) are in the
news every day, and I feel guilty blogging about how much fun I have been
having, knowing there is so much unrest right now.

Then of course the tsunami's and earthquakes in asia...the reprecussions of which have been felt here in Oregon. Little coastal towns have been evacuated, as people head inland.

But nonetheless, here it is...the past several weeks in my life.

I had a wonderful visit, out to the coast to see Jenn, Justin, and my little Abby. One
of the nicknames I have had for the last 18 years is Jackie, through a handful
of my closest friends. Abby gets very excited about Lily and I coming to visit
(and forgive me for forgetting my camera. I will ask Jenn to send me some pics)
and we read stories, coloured in her colouring books, chased each other around
the living room, and giggled and yelled “TOOT!” whenever she farted. What can I
say, I love that little girl.

She's also feeling being 2 and will be 3 soon. But hearing her talk and talk and hugging
me just warms my heart. We played in her little kitchen, and she snuggled and
played with Lily and told Lily she was “Abby's best friend.” Lily loves
everybody and has loved Abby since the day she met her, and they're close in
age. She enjoyed all the cuddles Abby gave to her frequently and their playtime. Jenn and I ran some errands in town, and her mother came over to watch Abby and all the dogs got to run around and play (her mom has a new puppy that I enjoyed watching Lily put in his place, as she is always up for playing but had NO patience for this upstart puppy in the beginning) and then coming home Abby has a DVD on called "Puppy Party" (with various breeds as puppies, litters of them playing...which for Abby and myself is like crack cocaine) and all the dogs running around...was awfully cute seeing Abby in bliss surrounded by animals.

I've grown up since my teen years into adulthood with the cats and dogs that Jenn and Justin
have had. They were the nieces and nephews before Abby was born, and I loved
them all madly. Mena, the alpha cat and one of the most intelligent (not to
mention very vocal, and you knew by the tone of her voice what she was saying)
I have ever come across was put to sleep several days ago, which makes this
last visit all the more memorable because I got to spend time with her before
she was put to sleep. The cat that ran the show but an absolute sweetie, had
been getting on in years and she lived in a home where she had so much love. I
have always said that seeing their animals is the extra bonus in my trips down,
and it is true.

My visit is usually and I always say I am going to get something done: a project to tackle
and some writing. Well, I did get some writing done, unfortunately it wasn't
for this website. But it was for another model for the supermodelicons.com
website, for model Patty Owen (it's in the blog section of the site!)I had a wonderful interview and I finally finished apiece that was really bothering me as to how to present it. I've been driving
Eva crazy because she's gung ho for the interviews, but I am not a professional writer I am just a blogger though I am flattered she likes mywriting.

Remember when I talked about one of my New Year's resolutions, was to learn how to crochet
again? I went after the New Year into the craft store and bought a skein of
yarn, and a little kit with a horrible booklet with confusing instructions, a
few crochet hooks in various sizes, stitch markers, and left with a dream. As
you can see below from that first cheesy booklet, that a seed was planted.

A booklet like this for me wasn't enough, I needed more. But this planted the seed in my brain.

I could get a chain stitch down and make them beautifully. But the next row? I was lost. And
I knew once before how to do it, it was a learned task during a different time
in my life when I was in seclusion from the world and in a several months long
drug rehab (nearly 4 years ago).

Insanity, and this isn't even half of it. I have more books coming in the mail. Plus you can see a cheesy sample swatch.

Well, Jenn and I managed to do a MAJOR tackle that visit: learning how to crochet.
We wentnuts and as you can see by the following photographs, they will completely
clarify what I acquired at an awesome lot sale of insanity: Various
contemporary crochet books in excellent condition that were encyclopedic in
stitch lessons and applying them to simple lessons, to other books for hats,
one of them I had seen years before and adored called “Stitch n Bitch Crochet:
The Happy Hooker” which is written by this awesome knitter who is the editor in
chief of BUST magazine (the coolest chick mag on the planet for creative and
progressive divas of all types), finding 3 different DVD's on ideas and
beginners introductory lessons. (THAT is what finally clicked and I have been
hooking happily ever since!) hitting thrift shops where we found vintage
patterns from the 1970's and a couple from the early 1980's. I of course am not
thrilled at the tackarama of a lot of the clothing pieces, but there were a few
things that were pretty.

Oh but wait, that's not all. I must explain a few purchases also made on amazon.com for
other books and eBay for a few purchases as well.

eBay landed me some fabulous 4 skeins of gorgeous German yarn which will be perfect for a
project I have in mind for Abby. It's a winter hat and scarf set. The other one, was supposed to be this
orgasmic booklet from the 1940's of a collection of 15 different FABULOUS hat
patterns. The wheels in my head went into overdrive...and then I find out later
after the auction closed that the seller misplaced it and couldn't locate it.
Sad, SO sad! The auction was cancelled. I became sick with grief when I
couldn't even find a decent pattern to make Lily a sweater for next winter.
Obstacles MUST be overcome! It is my dream to waltz into a vintage shop and
find some vintage crochet patterns for hats from the 20's and 40's, and crochet
lace lingerie, dresses and hats, that I can add a modern twist to. But the
trouble is finding them! I know that there are some old ladies sitting on them
somewhere and I demand they get up with their colostomy bags and dig through
some boxes and fork over the sweet patterns!

This is just what we scored at the thrift shops when I was at the coast and you cannot see the whole pile. Skeins are now balled up and I have even more to roll. I now buy more yarn every other day! Oh and there is that god awful swatch sample I made....popping up like a bad case of the clap!

Blog friends overseas, a plea: have you any patterns you'd be willing to scan and send me of
fabulous old hat crochet patterns from the flawless eras when ladies still wore
hats? This is a gay man who has a dream and wants to make you fabulous hats
after he masters the craft (all these books and my nightly stitch fests have
taken me over!) for you dames to wear with those perfect frocks and shoes.
Believe me, I am having dreams of adding vintage costume jewelry, and a lovely
antique shop near my house has a lovely selection at decent prices...sorry, I
am in dreamland!

My collection of needles has also grown since this pic was taken. Can we say, insanity?? Though I am having a hard time finding other tunision crochet needles (the longest one shown) in other sizes.

Learning to memorize the crochet instructions that are all in symbols that one must master.
You must also really check out where your book and patterns that you acquired
came from because the difference in U.K. And US stitches could have the same
symbols and names but the stitch itself depending on where those books come
from, will very much change the end result of a garment itself. I've still got
a lot to learn!

I spent a few weeks just making fabric swatches of different stitches, not taking care to
count my stitches or check the gauge (the end results looked pretty funny I
must declare, but I bought the perfect tape measure last night) just to get
comfortable with what I was doing. So, the other day I finally committed myself
to making a simple skateboarder style beanie. It turned out fine, with the
exception of the “seam” where each row is connected before you start on the
next row of stitches, I know I am doing something wrong, but only with practice
will it get better. I made another one and it is an improvement, but it isn't
satisfactory or gift worthy yet.

Now, the plan for the end of the month is that I will be house-sitting up in the Seattle area
for Liz and Josh, where I will be taking care of their 2 dogs (Lily in tow) and
devoting myself to being lazy and crocheting the whole time when I'm there.

Liz has become so enthralled at the fact that I am crocheting, that she is already bartering
for hand crochet bikinis amongst other things. She was really bubbly when I
told her I had been focusing on crochet for a few hours a night, and was
excited when I showed her a hat that I have the pattern for (a simple beanie
with an anarchy symbol stitched onto it), and already she has her heart set on
it. Things take time, I can't just whip out a bikini just yet! I'm still trying to perfect a hat!

I called her one afternoon recently after I had come across a crochet pattern book (on eBay)
from the early 1970's, which in the listing had a few examples of what could be
made from the book (over 150 patterns): Bikinis, 60's style dresses, hats,
etc. Many of the examples shown from the
book had lots of spring/summer outfits in obnoxious colours (which had Liz
experiencing rapture) and of course there were some horrible creations
(afghans, clothing, and the odd unibrowed ugly baby here and there) in the
listing, but there were a couple of things shown that made it a must purchase
(it had a 'buy it now' option) after she had recovered from her mild stroke.

She's as excited as I am to look through the damn thing!

Diving into my new hobby head first, Liz has taken off into several directions (well, I would
be lying if I said I wasn't encouraging her behaviour!) for outfits and
accessories and her excitement only matches my own.

Since Liz and Josh are on a vegan diet (somewhat, but they aren't fanatical PETA people about it) until they leave for Hawaii, I won't be able to makeYorkshire Puddings for Liz until after they get home (“don't even try and tempt me, as that would be very evil!” she laughed) When I told her I found a low fat healthy recipe for making them, she became very giddy.

So, all in all I know that like last time I will be kept busy: painting faces, cooking, and
now crocheting.

Good times!

Supermodel Interview!

2011-03-08T12:24:00.000-08:00

My interview with Patty Owen is up on supermodelicons.com! Hope you like it!

Shitty Blogger!

2011-03-06T13:17:00.001-08:00

I know I am in that category! I have a long post coming up in a couple of days letting all know what has happened the last few weeks! I have been so busy with crochet, I have a new addiction!

I Love Helga Von Trollop

2011-02-22T14:34:00.000-08:00

Thank Goodness she and G survived that massive earthquake in Christchurch. Word has it, that they are safe. Phew! Now may the recovery involve massive coats of glitter, big hair, and tulle!

Supermodel Icons: Tara Shannon

2011-02-14T15:34:00.001-08:00

Hey folks! I know I have been lax here, but my interview with supermodel Tara Shannon is up on the SMI website. More fun ones to come! Go to supermodelicons.com and click on SMI Blog and my interview is there for Tara. I would have made a hyperlink, but this computer I have been using sucks for making links for whatever reason, but it is done and is up. My next one to post soon will be with model Patty Owen.

Thanks for sticking by me and I hope you all enjoy it! Go on over and say hello to Eva and I and we hope you like our work we have been doing! xoxoxoxo

Tura Satana (R.I.P): Another Great Set of Boobs Paraglides to Heaven

2011-02-07T04:37:00.000-08:00


As Varla in Russ Meyer's "Faster, Pussycat! Kill! Kill!"

July 10, 1938 – February 4, 2011

How sad!

Yes, I am aware that it is very early in the morning. A person SHOULD be in bed. It is called: insomnia. But I am in a very lovely part of the country and I am out in the forest.

I should try and get some sleep, as Jenn's mum is coming over to look after Abby so we can go into town and hit some vintage and thrift stores. I popped 2 antihistamines so hopefully that will knock me out soon.

I'm also a loser, because I forgot my camera! No snapshots I'm afraid!

Goodness Me...a HOLIDAY awaits!

2011-02-02T14:51:00.000-08:00

I will be heading to the coastal mountains tomorrow for an improptu holiday. It pretty much goes without saying that I am always heading someplace for days at a stretch! But I have work to do when I get there somewhat. Interviewing models has been fun. I just completed and submitted my interview with Tara Shannon. Tara and I had a lovely nearly 2 hour conversation last week and she was seriously hilarious. What an uplifting piece of positive energy!

Fan Mail

2011-01-21T17:06:00.000-08:00

Brendan said...

i want to sleep with you so badly, even if you are all fucked up on
pills
love brendan

*********************************

This has to be one of the sweetest comments I have EVER recieved! And it is for an entry on February 9th of 2009! I just got it today when I pulled up my blogger page.

Do I really give off this image that I am half crocked on prescription medication?

Well, here I have it. Nearly sober 4 years off of street drugs (the hardest drug I take is my medical marijuana) and STILL people get the wrong idea about me!

And the shitty thing is I have NO way to contact him! He has no blogger profile

Well, I hope this poor Brenden character realizes my heart is broken because I will never know what could have been. Here I have waited my ENTIRE life for him, and he thinks I am Courtney Love.

Brenden, if you're out there...I extend an olive branch. Over some slasher flick, in a movie theatre I hope that we can hold hands amidst the bloodshed.

I think my background is pretty artsy...designer pills like that on a daily basis so you're not only wearing Chanel, Hermes, or Gucci, but you're ON Chanel, Hermes, or Gucci. Imagine if one day you felt like being a Louis Vuitton?

Too funny, nice to know someone wants to sleep with me! Now, I hope he doesn't think I am that russian girl I posted that I recieved that unsolicited email about. You all remember (and in case you haven't, go to that blog entry on the 9th of Feb. 2009) my heart was broken once before in cyberspace because my potential mail order bride fell through.

Love hurts, ya know?

hahahahahahahaha

My Belated Seattle Blog Entry, Happy Holidayz, and My NEW Year!

2011-01-06T16:42:00.000-08:00

Much to my horror, Lily NEEDED a bath after this picture!

Consider this VERY long entry my hello to you all, and an apology that I haven't been writing. I am still in a “bare bones” operating system for my computer (am on a Linux system right now for my laptop) which of course sucks, because my laptop is about 3 years old and runs just fine, with the exception of it needing a complete Windows overhaul! I'm frugal, what can I say? I count my blessings that I can still type.

I hope I can keep your attention!

So, because I don't have a wireless driver working for my “toddler” computer, I am screwed for awhile. I can tap into a “hardline” no problem. So, these long entries take days, sometimes weeks to write...as I have so much to cram in.

It's my dailies in one post, my “days in review” I guess, or perhaps boredom encourages me to write something.

I'll post a few pictures, though Liz has plenty of the best ones on her page for the month of December. I am super busy so I would post more, but head on over to see tons of more pics!

I wish that I was one of those peeps who could just grab a camera, and get the snaps from when I go someplace to visit. It's the same way when I think I am going on a holiday and believe that I am going to “get some writing done”, which never happens! I had my camera there and didn't get many pictures (I was kept VERY busy in the kitchen and painting faces).

I had a lovely time in the Seattle area, that was not without memories of the past and memories of the present.

I lived in Seattle from 1996 through 1999, and despite the fact that it is just a few hours north of me from where I currently am living, I haven't been back to Seattle since I left it in February of 1999.

It was surreal, pulling into the train station. Not only was I going to be in the holiday madness of the International District of the city at rush hour from the train depot, but I was seeing my close friends (one of them a former roommate and co-worker) of many years, Liz and Corinne. So, it is kind of funny to be pulling into a former city that you lived in, to visit friends that you knew from yet another city you once lived in, in Idaho. 2 different times of my life, melted together.

I was seeing 2 very dear friends of mine, that I hadn't seen for 6 years. One of those things that happen when all of us are not in good places in our lives, and feelings get hurt. But for 3 of those 6, we have kept in close contact and bygones are just that: bygones...well Liz and I have. Though I know Corinne is a fan of games of all sorts and with her free time playing fucking “World of Warcraft” with 2 fucking computer monitors going at the same time, I know she'd write me more often if she wasn't locked in duel with thousands of wizards and what not. I worry she'll get 'rhoids! And, just because “I said so...” when she gets them, she'll maybe remember to email me! (love ya babes!)

As soon as I walked onto the platform and headed to the lobby of Amtrak and I let out a “Yeah BABE!” (a la Patsy Stone from Absolutely Fabulous) when I saw my girls, and Lily and I were off to the beautiful suburb North of Seattle, after I dove head first into Corinne's double D-cups.

Driving through Seattle as we fought to get onto the freeway near the Convention Center (and by the apartments-turned condo's that I once lived in with Jon when I was 20) and we gabbed the whole way to pick up coffee, Mexican food, and to unload prezzies and the jackpot for the night was as usual: my makeup bag. The city that I once lived in, WHIZZED by (and I am thankful) and off to 'burbs we went. But seeing the skyline again at night was lovely I must say. Kinda glad actually to be in the suburbs for the fact that whenever I leave the city I usually prefer a place that is quieter than what I left, and Liz's house was sooo cozy. It was perfect!

Oh was it fun. Everything just picked up where it left off: I'm laying out the make-up brushes and Corinne is

Corinne downed a couple shots of what she called “Blueberry Pancakes” and was in ecstasy when I told her about a Vodka I had heard about that was whipped cream flavoured. So now to add to her recipe said voddy, and she was in heaven. Her face was the first to withstand an assault from my makeup brushes.

I have to honestly say, that I was extremely rusty. The end results were satisfactory, but not of my best. It was an act that I was to be called upon to execute several times, to the end result of Liz putting on an outfit and clicking away with her camera.

No complaints, I gladly granted their wishes. It was my pleasure!

I of course set up camp in the kitchen, and set out to destroy everything Liz had trained herself to not eat, and she had an excuse: she loves my cooking.

Yorkshire Puddings were requested 3 times when I was there. The final night of them, Liz and her lovely husband Josh turned them into a dessert with warm berry mixtures and whipped cream. Now keep in mind, these puddings were cooked in butter. I do not believe Liz uses real butter to cook with. Comparing our waistlines is proof of that, but I am with comedienne Mo'Nique and her aprons that say “Skinny Chefs Can't Be Trusted!”. This also is in addition to the one night she requested my stuffed french toast. In fact, when I talked to Liz after Christmas, she informed me of all the new things she got for Christmas that are stored in the kitchen...awaiting another visit from me.

Now, whenever I get around my girlfriends I have had this UNCANNY knack to induce their monthly visit. Isn't that hilarious? Now, what's funny about this visit is that I didn't have anything to do with Liz getting her period. She had it before I showed up.

Instead, she was blessed with recovering from “Aunt Flo” as I was arriving. We couldn't have predicted what happened next, oh no. Well, after all we ARE getting OLD in years sweetie...she's 31 (bless her) early last month.

After 3 days, Liz hadn't shit yet.

It had to have been my home cooked meals. She drinks STRONG coffee and that still wouldn't get her to let one loose, so imagine my delight in going grocery shopping and at the checkout amidst all the veggies, crunchy treats, and such...there's a Kroger Brand enema that boasted it was “Latex free”.

Just what one should serve like an after dinner mint, when requested to cook stuffed French Toast (and I marvelled at the irony of it all when an enema and stuffed French Toast were on the agenda for an evening!)

Glad I could have been there for my girl to clog her up. Isn't that horrible? But I redeemed myself because I was there (well, in the living room. I didn't choose to witness Niagara Falls) when she used anal 'liquid plumber”! Between her bowels and the few times she missed peeing on a stick to find when she's ripe for getting knocked up, my dear friend had a LOT on her plate in addition to my visit!

But, would ya know. The active ingredients are a saline compound and she “released” just fine after that little helper. It was hilarious as she read the box and made commentary about the “bubble butt drawn model” that showed her the positions that she'd have to be in, in order for our little poopsie to happen.

Seriously, situations like this only happen when I am with certain friends.

I also informed Liz, that every gay man (of which she is one) in life experiences a last minute enema at some point or another so not to worry. But even if she was 98 years old and my mother, she'd have to do it herself!

I wish I had videotaped her apprehension and discussing the positions she was going to have to get into.

Oh, my lil girl is all grown up!

Been there myself, but for much different reasons.

GOD! I MISS SAN FRANCISCO!

Feces aside, we had lots of other adventures:

I should never have entertained the idea of being able to visit a few old haunts, because the weather was NOT in my favour at all. But we did manage to sneak in an “Op Shop” as my dames down Under are so fond of referring to: Red Light. Long a must visit when on University Avenue near the University of Washington (also with a location in the famed gay neighbourhood of Capitol Hill, where I once lived in the city) with sections like : 1950's, 1920's, feather boas, 1970's, wigs, handbags, luggage, sunglasses, jewelry, shoes...I really had wished that Auntie Helga and some of my other vintage bloggers were on hand, because they would have shit themselves. They have really nice workers and the prices were fabulous.

I didn't know where to begin! Liz and I dove into the 1960's frocks with our pent up zeal in hopes of finding her just the right...we had no ideas on what we were looking for, but whatever jumped out at us. You know how it goes! A few things were tried on, and Liz settled on a purple velvet number with some nice embroidery on it (very hippie chic), that I believe may have been modified by a previous owner as it looked more like a cute smock like shirt than a mini-dress. But nonetheless, it looked lovely on Liz and she bought an enamel pin from the 1970's to wear on the lapel of her jacket. Saddened that a green sequined party dress didn't fit and had no shape and was blah. Yeah yeah I know, there is famine in the world and many people worry about dolphin free canned tuna, but I'm sorry! It is a sad state when you find a sequined “somethingorother“ that ends up shattering all dreams of sparkle glory by seriously being a piece of shit. I swear, it is gaudy and sparkly outfits like that that demand justice and good tailoring...sadly, the tubed dress just missed and ruined all expectations. I sighed, and continued browsing...my heart all over the floor for my friend and what might have been.

Now, anyone worth their weight in beef (and living in or around the King Country area of Seattle) CANNOT deny themselves a late night treat in the form of Dicks. Actually, I cannot think of a time of day when Dicks wouldn't be appropriate. These little drive in burger joints that boast “Dick's :100% Pure Beef” (they really do!) on their signs, have been serving up hand cut french fries and burger grease since the 50's, and it really is an institution. So after thrifting, we hit the place.

One understands, I should hope!

So, we get up to the window to place our order and then are told they don't accept debit cards. Flustered (not to mention floored) because it was raining, and the walk across the street up a block in torrential Northwestern US rain to a bank, was seriously not within reason for either one of us.

So, back to the suburbs we went grumbling about wanting a cheeseburger

But Josh was a sweetie and on another day drove and picked up DICK's for the two raving queens in the house

There were a few other places I wanted to go, but it was rainy and windy. I really wanted to go to Gasworks Park, as the view from the park is one of my favourite in the city. Places have such memories for me, and actually despite how crazy a life I was living in Seattle what with parties and being 20 years old.

In the end, I cooked SOMETHING that night. I can't recall what it was, as I made all sorts of different food upon request: Thai, turkey roasts of various body parts, lots of foods containing eggs...I don't know, all I can remember is hearing praises from Liz in the form of farting (as well as compliments that were spoken) and happiness at seeing everyone loading up on my cooking. Oh we did have baked felafels the last night.

No wonder she was plugged up. Oh, and just because I am an old palsied Queen at 35, I will share that my Liz didn't have a bowel movement on her own, a day or so later after I had left. Nice huh?

One evening, we went shopping at grocery/variety store chain that are all over the various counties, when lo and behold I ran into a girlfriend I have known since I was 20: Laura. I've known Laura since she was in High School and randomly running into her was a treat. Sadly, with all of the various lists of things we had to accomplish, and even my extended stay of a few days, I didn't get to see Laura other than that one brief moment. Oddly, Laura and I run into one another in the strangest of places: Seattle, the 'burbs of Seattle, Boise Idaho...somehow we'll find one another in the most random of places. She's married and has a business involving animal boarding...my dream job. Being surrounded by dogs of all shapes and sizes as a babysitter and companion when the parents are out of town, as well as visiting other animals at their homes? Sounds like heaven to me! But sadly, I didn't get to see her. But I shall be returning soon.

I upgraded Liz's homosexuality by watching marathon snippets of Dame Edna and Madame the puppet, of which she was gleefully happy to watch.

We also watched Season 5 of “Absolutely Fabulous”, which Liz had never seen. It was funny watching her squirm in parts of it, because as per usual Patsy Stone and Edina Monsoon terrorize Eddy's daughter Saffy, and Liz was horrified that this season the ante was upped and they REALLY outdid themselves in the cruel jabs department, bless them!

Corinne graced us with her presence once again, and that visit was all planned out. Late the night before, she announced that her 22 year old boy-toy from Fiji (whom Liz and I kept Shish-Kabob because we kept forgetting his real name: Rajneel) would be dropping her off at Liz's place in the late morning hours the following day.

Liz and I shared a blanket and lay on opposite ends of the couch.

“Shit!” I mumbled. “What are we going to do to embarrass her?”

“That's EXACTLY what I was thinking!” she giggled.

Well, that gave Liz and I PLENTY of time to figure out that we were going to dress up in something embarrassingly obnoxious and run out to the car when they pulled up.

Liz and I were laying on the couch sharing a blanket and giggling for a good hour, laughing ourselves silly and looking like two nutbags in an asylum wearing straight-jackets about what we would wear. It was the sheer idea of it all that had us in a good laugh, just because we knew Corinne would just shake her head in defeat.

That's exactly what happened.

So, another night of makeup ensued and Josh got on the turntables and on came the disco ball and black lights, and the girls hula hooped.

Both Liz and Corinne love hooping and have a couple of them each, and in their little play-land of “Burning Man” that I have been annoyed with hearing about from many people for many years (why pay all that money to go to the desert? I need water thank you, and plenty of it!), they like to hoop about on their travels. They've been doing it for years. Corinne likes to hula-hoop in her bedroom sometimes when she's had a cocktail or two and Kabob is to be enlisted in helping her locate a floor to ceiling mirror she can watch herself in.

She says it is for hooping, but I know Corinne is really a minx deep down and I called her on her bullshit and said that I was sure hooping wasn't the only reason, especially when I saw her bedroom in her apartment and where she wanted to put the damn thing.

They haven't gone “all the way”, but c'mon now...he's 22, Corinne is 30 and could be a centerfold in BIGGUNS magazine if she applied herself. All she has to do is give the girls a shimmy, he'll get hard and drive her anywhere. He's been awfully sweet about being her little taxi cab, sadly when we ran outside in our insane outfits I didn't get a good look at her island love-uh. Though he did wave hello to Liz as she danced about her front yard in her horrible day glo ski outfit carrying her pink ukelele.

She did however inform us that he was uncircumcised, and she didn't really get a moments rest from Liz and I making jokes about how they look.

For a good 20 minutes as Liz and I sat in front driving Corinne (a.k.a 'Maude the Broad') home the next afternoon she had to listen to Liz and I asking her questions (of which 90% of them were met with silence) about lover-boy, and immediately doing what we do best in situations where we don't know the person: we unanimously agree and judge them accordingly, anyways.

Isn't that what friendship is really all about folks? Hmmm, well...maybe, maybe not...but I was sure having fun!

“Like one of those water weenie toys that you play catch with.” or “They look like aardvarks or an ant eater! Don't you worry about his junk smelling much less tasting like.... bad feta?”

Even hubby Josh (The Boy on Liz's blog) giggled and sent Corinne a text that said “Rumpleforeskin” after hearing the term in a movie one night in reference the poor chap. He even sent a picture (bless him) of the last night I made Yorkshire Puddings (called: Puddin' by the time I left) with the puddin' as the pic with the note 'We're out of feta.'

It's times like that, that make me so proud to have a family of friends always letting others know in only a way we understand, that they're in our thoughts.

My prezzie was delightful from Liz. She got me a beautiful neon blue T-shirt made in the UK that says “I don't do earth tones”, matching the one she got in neon green. That quote has pretty much been my mantra in life when it comes to make-up.

Liz and hubby, are trying to have a baby. I was extremely amused at this little object that she had, where you're supposed to urinate on a stick and stick it into a machine, so you can be told how fertile you are and when the best time would be to conceive. Something like a 6 hour window frame that she must urinate within, otherwise it can throw off the cycle. Thanks to me taking a shower one morning, she was 2 minutes late to log her piss. My hat is off to her though, I couldn't imagine having my morning minutes upon waking, calculated. Surprisingly though, in recent years wakes up in a cheerful mood to her cup of coffee. Oh the old days she would be GRUMPY, but she wakes up with a smile to the wagging tails of her dogs Maggie and Molly.

Lily had a LOT of fun, having 2 big dogs to play with. And PLAY she did! Liz has a huge fenced in acre for her back yard, and Lily was thrilled to romp around and get dirty (much to my dismay which Liz watched in my facial expressions with sheer delight) with the other two and she was inseparable from them. A very spoiled little girl, she demanded and got lots of love from her new friends and was a peach on the train, making new friends in the process as well. Molly (also called Bear Cub) and Maggie were lots of fun and were fun to hang out with. But then again, you know me and animals.

Liz is a Speech Pathologist and Josh is an Occupational Therapist at a nursing and rehabilitation facility (Liz worked there as well and one point, they met at this place) with the elderly, and after a bath one day, we took Lily to visit with the patients. Lily knew immediately that she had a job to perform when we walked in the doors. I should have had a copy of her immunizations with me (she is current) so one of the many staff members said that I should check in with the director of the building, someone whom Liz doesn't really care for. The lady happened to be a Shih-Tzu lover, and gave the green light and Lily was off to do some visits.

Some of the patients are recovering from perhaps a surgery at a hospital, or a stroke, but a majority of the patients were in various stages of dementia. Usually in someplace new, where I don't know anyone, I can get pretty anxious. Here, I felt fine. Seeing the residents respond with glowing eyes and smiles to my little girl was lovely. Lily has been to the State Hospital for the mentally ill earlier this year, so I was thrilled that Liz was enthusiastic about the idea of taking us to visit.

She was on her best behaviour and was very sweet to the patients that we went and visited. One of them, was an old Southern woman. VERY southern, and by her southern twang, the way she talked you could tell she had come from a very good family. She had also owned small lap dogs (what a surprise!) all her life, so seeing Lily was a real treat for her. Every lap Lily hopped on, made those folks smile.

And that was the best part of the day.

I left there smiling myself.

All in all, I had a really wonderful visit with my friends. It is one of those cases where I again get a little sad that they're not as close by in person as I would like. Liz was saying I should move closer to the Seattle area, and though the idea was entertained in my head for a minute...Jenn would KILL me if I moved further away. After all, Abby needs her gay uncle around to ensure she grows up to be a diva.

Lots of times when I return home from a trip someplace, though I am happy to be able to curl up with Lily in my bed and be in my own space...I do have to admit to getting into a funk sometimes when visiting certain people. When I get home from visiting Jenn and Justin I get in a funk because not only do I miss my friends, but all the animals and especially playing with Abby.

Coming home from Liz's house was no different, I was bummed. “Oh what am I going to do now for entertainment?” Not that I am ever really bored, but because I had so much fun seeing my friends. But I have called her a few times saying “I wanna come over to your house and play!”

Thus far I have had a lovely little holiday season.

I called all my friends Christmas Eve and Christmas day so they could have their holiday cackle from me, and Christmas Eve, I spent with my friend Paul hand rolling turkey and vegan tamales (never made them by hand before and now I know how...so, Liz beware if I come to visit again, I have my own twist created in my head!) for the tamale party he has every Christmas Eve. He's a fey balding man in his late 50's, who sings in the Gay Mens Chorus here in Portland and also competes in Barbershop Quartet competitions internationally. The party went until midnight, and then when I came back I gave Lily all of her presents...of course, she got several. The party was lovely, I got to spend it with my dear friend Lynda whom I know from one of my meetings. A visit with Lynda is always an occasion to smile, and this was no exception. Such a sweet lady and I am glad I got to ring in the holiday with her!

The Dollar Store is a godsend for a parent with a pooch who loves her toys but isn't destructive. Because I walk by one a couple times a week, I cannot help going in and dropping a few dollars on toys for Lily and Christmas was NO exception. She got 2 new leashes (and very well made for the price!), some raw-hides, ceramic food and water dishes that were cute, and a BUNCH of squeaky toys. I put everything together the day of because I can't wait for days to play with new toys with her, so I hung up the stocking before we went took a nap on Christmas eve before the party. Then she went and charmed the guests and when we got home, she got to play with her toys.

Maybe next year she'll get a new basket, as the LAUNDRY basket that is filled to the brim with all her toys is going to over-flow this year at some point. I don't think she's too spoiled, and unlike many children she has no problem sharing her toys. But yes, I think some sort of order is needed, don't ya think?

Once again, I didn't think to take my camera even though it was right down the hall. Mostly because many of the people there are in 12 step programs when they're not at work. Paul was in good spirits nonetheless, and some festive poofs sang the classic Christmas carol “We Three Queens”. You'd have thought some sexy blue collar worker would have dressed up like Santa...nothing like the tickle of someone's facial hair on your ear and neck, to remind you what the real meaning of Christmas is.

But, I didn't have a hand in putting together this party.

The world the last month has been pretty scary all over, and it was nice to have something to put my mind at ease like it is.

The media in the US, does SO much to place us in this state of fear and panic because of all of the bomb scares, and I don't want to make it seem like I don't think about it when it happens because I don't mention my reactions, especially when a globally known threat was thwarted, by an immigrant student from Oregon State University...in the small cozy town that I grew up in: Corvallis.

When the news reports were flying, about the 19 year old Somalian man...I was extremely saddened for a few reasons.

First, it was to happen at an annual event in downtown Portland: the Christmas tree lighting ceremony. Thousands of people were saved, by a fake bomb that never went off when he called the cell phone that would have murdered thousands.

He went to the mosque in my hometown. The same mosque, built by an Islamic community that my father, a man that had the only international grocery 75 miles any direction..was very good friends with. They were my family too for many of my early years before the recession hit and my father never recovered on many levels: financial, personal, and business. In those days with college students and many international students with their families, we came to know many of the families in a small town where when school was in session, never (I do not believe) peaked beyond 43,000 people when I was living there.

I knew that when the news hit that he lived in Corvallis, that it was a matter of time before someone would attack the mosque.

Sure enough, it happened.

Whenever something like this happens, I fear for anyone anywhere in the USA who has their head covered for any reason and wears some sort of robe because they have a good chance of becoming a target for something hateful, or their place of worship is damaged.

When will it ever stop? Even before the mosque had been damaged, many members and even the young man's own family said that he had become reclusive and hadn't attended any prayer meetings or events in the building for a long time. The members of this mosque come from countries all over the world and many are active in that small town community on many levels. The beauty of that, is that where in their homelands they may not like a person because they come from the next country over, at least here they can find comfort in their religion in a new land (a land where there is freedom of religion) and become friends.

Then the young man who attacked the mosque, was someone who volunteered with humanitarian charities there locally.

It's insane, this world of ours.

Then Mumsie emails me that during their visit to my sister for Christmas, that my stepfather's luggage was stolen from their rental car. How horrible! The windows were busted out, and they got away with his laptop, iPod, and camera as well. The email was rather cryptic, and I haven't heard back to my asking if they had insurance to cover such a horrible event.

A couple of days before Christmas, a family was visiting a child in the childrens' cancer unit at Oregon Health and Sciences University and their SUV was broken into with all of their gifts for their family and dozens from the public for this child as well...stolen right out of the vehicle in the parking lot.

What is going on in the world?

My mother tends to tell me news of an “exciting” nature, sometimes as 'matter of fact' as she possibly can, as if she thinks I am not going to react. Like when she told me (right before Thanksgiving in fact!) that earlier this summer she had had a blood clot in her lung, and was in the hospital. Hadn't spoken on the phone in a few weeks, but of course exchange several emails a week and have for years and this is how she tells me? NOW??

That was nothing! She saved the skin cancer removal story for me for the Thanksgiving holiday as if it was some sort of premeditated revenge for something I had done, like piercing my septum when I was 20...well, that obviously is me being dramatic, but come on! This is my mother!

So of course she drops this whole thing about the robbery in an email and that she isn't feeling well, but that she had a lovely holiday and thanked me for my birthday gift and Christmas cards I had mailed when I got back from Seattle.

If something was wrong with me and Mom didn't know, she would shit bricks.

Mothers just have a lovely way of doing things.

I spoke to Liz's mother when I was in Seattle and mentioned how excited I was about Liz trying to have a baby. Liz's mother is 100% Mom, and is one of those people who is just a character and there is honestly no way one could write anything to enhance her personality. She has always made me laugh, especially when she drives Liz nuts or says something that makes Liz exclaim “Jesus Christ, mother!”

“Well, I haven't mentioned anything to Liz about this,” she confided in me for that phone call and then says the fateful magic words “Don't mention this to Liz as it will upset her.” and don't you all know who was about to die and crest the heavens? Me! Here it was, DISH! “But you would NEVER believe what I heard on the news about women over the age of 30 trying to get pregnant.” and keep in mind that Liz is 31. “Your fertility rate drops by 90 percent after the age of 30, can you believe that?

I grinned, knowing full well that sitting on a piece of knowledge like this would have been to much for Liz's mother to contain. So, when I got off the phone with Liz's mother I of course couldn't resist saying something about what her mother had told me happens to a woman over the age of 30.

“FUCK!” Liz exclaimed. “Why the hell did she-She HAS told me that before...like EVERY time I talk to her on the phone!” Liz let out a loud sigh and bellowed as she put on her jacket to to step outside with her coffee. “Jesus Christ, Mom!” Liz muttered aloud as she went outside.

I followed.

“She's told me that like a million times!” Liz continued. “Has she forgotten? I guess not, she has you as a new audience!” Liz snickered as she gracefully sipped her coffee.

I laughed at my friend and the relationship that only a mother and child can have when the child is a grown adult. I hadn't heard anything about the whole mess of hormones and percentages like her mother had mentioned. I've known that they say the older you get, the harder it is on the mother to have the baby for a myriad of reasons, I should have taken into account the changes in the hormones...I just figured if a girl is “dropping eggs” as someone great once said (me, just now) that means she still can get pregnant. Goodness, for someone who spends SO much time with women and is considered “one of the girls”, I am SO lax in reproductive health knowledge! I think I will go check out a copy of “Our Bodies, Ourselves”.

“Ya know twins run in the family and I hope to GOD I don't have twins!” Liz moaned. “That would just about do me in on many levels.” she shuddered. “Fuck, could you really imagine?”

But it's cute. Even when our mothers are driving us nuts they still make us grin.

2011 should be an interesting year.

I'm buckling down and getting school sorted out, dieting again, attempting to quit smoking once and for all, re-teaching myself to crochet (I had a meltdown in the yarn section yesterday at the fabric store with Debbie and decided THEN that I was going to crochet again so I bought some stuff) AND I will be contributing some writing to Supermodelicons.com every now and then! Isn't that fabulous? I'm flattered that a person who has worked with some of the greatest artists in fashion history: Helmut Newton, Horst, Chris Von Wagenheim, Way Bandy.... likes my writing enough to allow me to contribute something.

Eva has already said that two of her colleagues, supermodels Juli Foster and Tara Shannon have agreed to let me interview them! I seriously cannot believe that my simple curiosity for an iconic 1970's Calvin Klein ad, has led to this lovely little project. I have kept in touch with Eva of course, sending along fashion spreads I have come across for albums she is putting together for the page that I know would be of interest and pointing out new models I have come across. Sorry if it seems like I am bragging, but I am just so excited!

Now, of course I am calling on all of my girls out there in the universe to help me brainstorm a little. For all of you other girls (and poofs, pretty interchangeable in my book) that love fashion magazines and models, especially of a vintage nature...PLEASE, step up to the front of the line and let me know of fashion related history (photographers, designers, models, fragrances, advertisements etc...) that you would like to see chronicled.

Happy New Year to you all!

I know...I am a HORRIBLE Blogger!

2011-01-02T13:13:00.000-08:00

I know, I am a TERRIBLE blogger and I have SO much to bhlog about right now! My computer is still on the fritz, trying to find a wireless driver for it. BUT I intend to keep at it and not give up. I have a VERY long entry headed your way very soon, just give me a few days to edit it.

I hope you all had a wonderful New Year's and holiday! I have so much talk about: my trip to Seattle, the holidays...just a few more days and I'll be up and running before you know it!

Much LOVE to you all!

Going Home

2010-12-17T12:03:00.001-08:00

Today I'm going home. I have so much to blog about, but my damn computer is on the fritz and on a Linux system now and I need a wireless card to fix it. I have oodles of pics to post, and will do so. Liz, Corinne and I had a lovely time.

I'll miss Liz thats for sure! See ya all soon!

Happy Birthday 2 Me

2010-12-12T00:46:00.001-08:00

Having fun with Liz and am enjoying that as of this moment, I am 35...will post pics when we get the chance...been to busy cooking and playing in my makeup...xoxo

World AIDS Day (Belated) Entry: My Interview With a Supermodel

2010-12-02T15:58:00.000-08:00

****Hey everyone! Sorry for the delay in getting this out. Let me just say first off, that ANYTHING having to do with Windows Vista or Microsoft PERIOD, annoys the crap out of me. My computer is down, but Mazzy isn't and I refuse to let technology get the better of me! So, here we go...here is the entry you all have been waiting for! I wish I could have gotten it to you yesterday. But better late than never, eh? Enjoy!****

Today is a day of reflection, of an epidemic that we still are in the midst of fighting.

Growing up as a child in the 80's, I can remember all too clearly the panic and the fear of the disease. I never knew that one day I myself would be a statistic. How it happened is seriously pointless to discuss, because in some ways I fit the stereotype of the early victims of the disease (I am a survivor, not a victim...but I am an outspoken gay man who loves make-up and beautiful women) who passed in those days.

Patrick Kelly

During that first decade, no business was hit harder by the epidemic than the fashion industry: stylists, make-up artists, fashion designers, photographers, and models of both sexes. This was an industry I myself gravitated towards as I myself was growing up, and as I was growing into an adult before they discovered that multi-drug therapy wasn't so much a cure, but could prolong life.

Way Bandy - Make-up Artist Deee-vine!

Designers like Patrick Kelly, Halston, Perry Ellis, groundbreaking makeup artist Way Bandy and a supermodel named Gia Carangi who, in their prime and at the height of their careers passed away from AIDS, have left a legacy of influence that still exists today within the fashion industry. They are prime examples of what defined an era. Their designs, their photographs, the faces who changed an industry...their art...still are used as a reference point for people who collect, or aspire to design or model themselves.

Perry Ellis

Those people I named are amongst the most well publicly well known, as victims in the first decade of the disease. But there are so many others who never made the headlines, or had books written about them, that contributed to that fantasyland that is the fashion industry.Now, you all know how much I love a fashion photograph that nabs my attention. Sometimes the clothes to me are secondary, it is the model wearing them that entrances me first. I understand now what Diana Vreeland once said to Grace Mirabella about a fashion shoot "Give me a dream!" she ordered.

Entranced, that is pretty much how this whole little entry snowballed into what I am sharing with you today. I am paying my respects to the people I admire, and I have a lovely acquaintance who has generously allowed me to ask some questions, and for all my vintage fashionista peeps...don your best frock, and make sure you have your coral lipstick (for muh girls down Under in springtime) or classic red lipstick and a cocktail...

I have a WHOPPER for you ladies! (and it's a LONG one!)

I was looking for a particular photograph of a Calvin Klein advertisement featuring supermodel Patti Hansen (wife of Keith Richards). when I stumbled across a couple of websites maintained by one of Patti's fellow supermodels, a lovely woman (on many levels) named Eva Voorhees.

Eva Voorhees by Rico Puhlman

Eva is one of those people so passionate about the work she did and extremely loyal and grateful to those artists as well. She has the same passion that anyone else has with the interest in the industry co-workers both past and present to ensure that the models will always be remembered and that their work is celebrated. She worked with these people, she has fond memories of these people.

Well, you know me. Dangle a vintage photograph up that is fabulous, and you KNOW I will bite!

Anyways, I am getting off track!

After messaging one another back and forth and my sending her a few photographs for her to host on one of the many little projects that she has going, I asked Eva if she would be interested in maybe sharing some thoughts with me about the early days of the epidemic, her work as a model, and her opinions on how and what needs to be done to help eradicate the disease.

Eva Voorhees: Vogue UK 1979 by Eric Boman

This sweet woman said yes, and I am excited to be able to share with you a glimpse into the phone calls we had over the Thanksgiving holiday to get this entry executed.

What a treat I can say first off, not only is she a pistol who has a brilliant sense of humour, she is outspoken and passionate in what she believes in, intelligent and she has a lapdog...all things I admire in anyone....and you know me, it is ALWAYS a puppy that seals the deal for me on a person. In fact, when she called me on her cell phone Thanksgiving Day as she was walking her dog in a park, she giggled and kept apologizing because people kept coming up to pet her little girl as we were talking, a sweet and fluffy Chihuahua named: Johnny Depp.

I laughed back and said "I could be one of those people, so I understand!"

Here was a woman, to me who defies EVERYTHING you would think about a model, because of what rules and boundries she laid down for herself, not to mention just her personality.

I had to borrow this collage from a recent interview Eva did with Fantasticsmag. Links will follow later, but I just had TOO many pictures to choose from and this is only a handful of the greats she got to wear, and model in front of the lense for!

Eva Voorhees (in her twenties she legally changed it back to the original European orgin, from her birthname of Voorhis) a shy, introverted, animal loving girl hails from California, and was signed by Nina Blanchard, and then after Eileen Ford paid a visit, she arrived near the end of 1978 in New York signing to Eileen Ford's monster agency. Then as now she still loves animals and who was (and still is, to this day) in awe of the people in the industry that she came across when she went to New York to try her hand at modeling.

A week after her meeting with Eileen, she boards a plane and heads to New York City with 26.00 in her pocket and starts her go-see's across the city right away, walking in the only pair of shoes she owned.

"I wanted to cry sometimes because my feet hurt, but I just kept walking to my appointments."she has said to Fantastics magazine.

Eva has been before the lenses of the greats: Scavullo, Helmut Newton, Richard, Avedon, Arthur Elgort, Dennis Piel, Horst, Chris von Wagenheim (there are dozens more to list) numerous high profile campaigns for top design houses like Calvin Klein, Valentino, Perry Ellis, and cosmetic companies, not to mention a plethora of magazine covers. Her first magazine cover was in 1979 for Cosmopolitan.

She participated in the collection seasons, and said Perry Ellis was the show to always capture her heart. She loved the spirit and the energy his shows produced, sadly he is gone. The intense energy of the shows didn't work with her personality, but she said Perry always made it simple and she had fun. It was Perry who really pushed for the print models to get exposure on the catwalks.

Eva was also tagged with the nick-name "Greta Garbo", because she wasn't a party girl (she went to Studio 54 about 3 times and didn't care for the pomp and bullshit of having to be "chosen" to get into the club by the bouncers), she would sometimes have 3 back to back assignments to complete and afterwards at home just preferred to sit in front of her TV with her cats.

Not so much interested in the celebrity recognition that came along with her work, she didn't hire a press agent (Like Jerry Hall) to put her name in the columns, she was just a professional dame doing a job and liked to keep it that way.

"I got a lot of flack, which at times was hurtful." she told me. "I was painfully shy, and though aware of my great fortune of getting as much work that I was being literally handed, I was sensitive to what people were saying to me because I wasn't a party girl. Yes, I had my friends that I had made through work but it was never about the being a celebrity." she told me about celebrity recognition.

But her hard work paid off, and we are blessed she continues to work hard to preserve the memory of the people who she not only worked with, but for people of every era for every level of the business. I'm glad I got to chat with her, and that she indulged me and us all by coming to my little dog and pony show to answer my questions and so I can encourage other fashion lovers to her sites.

When the illness began to become known in the industry, what was the reaction from your experience?
All of sudden, there was a really strange illness we were hearing about that was whispered, and then of course the newspapers REALLY reacted to the story and it created a panic. It was the gay mens disease according to the headlines. This kind of hit and happened out of nowhere. It was the early days of the 1980's.

What were some of the incidents that you personally witnessed?
I would be at work, and there would be whispers...whispers of paranoia amongst everyone, or someone's feelings would get hurt extremely easily (and considering the medium we were all in it just heightened emotions) For example, I was getting made up for a shoot and I mentioned to the stylist about a hairstyle that I had liked that another artist had done. The stylist had an upset (who was working on my hair at the moment) and left the studio. It was then mentioned to me that he had this illness. 2 months or so later, he was gone. It began to kind of snowball from then, and people began to die and disappear. Then there would be the whispering of course, that "so and so" passed away from the illness.

How do you believe the industry reacted?
I believe that the fashion industry, despite what was going on really did in those early days...did what they could to put on a brave face. There were those who were in denial, who perhaps not only had the disease, but then there was also the factor of people denying rumours to squash them- to protect those who were possibly infected from having their feelings hurt. You know how rumours work, and the fashion industry was no different. All it would take was for one person to say or speculate that "so and so has AIDS." and the rumours would become rampant. It could really make an assignment difficult, because of the fear that people felt. People wouldn't want to work together out of fear of contraction.

Which of course could make things difficult?
Of course, you couldn't help but be concerned for your safety and well being. We just didn't know. Like for instance, a makeup artist working with me licked a q-tip and I reacted. That thing was going to touch my eye? No way! I mean if you think about it, that isn't sanitary to begin with but we didn't know the exact nature of contraction or passing on the disease.

Cocaine was the big drug at the time, and I wasn't a drug user. I was too shy and scared. I was always trying to eat healthy and ate macrobiotic, which of course in the beginning I got a lot of flak for. I noticed that dietary concerns in reaction to the early days of HIV amidst the people I worked with, change. Where I once was teased ruthlessly for eating healthy, all of a sudden these same people switched to a macrobiotic diet, which they thought might work as a preventative measure as it had found success with helping people with cancer. So there were people who thought that if they ate macrobiotic, quit using drugs and cleaned up their act, then they wouldn't die. Lots of people became more health conscious, that isn't to say that there weren't those who still went after substances and life with reckless abandon, but I did notice a shift in dietary concerns amidst people.


Gia Carangi for Giorgio Armani (about 1980)

By the time that you had started working, Gia Carangi was already an established and sought after model. Did you recognize Gia anywhere in the film of the same name as she was portrayed by Angelina Jolie?
No. I thought the film was an extremely big piece of fiction. The woman portrayed was not the woman that I knew in real life.

We always hear all about how she was this heroin addicted model with so many problems and so many people focus on that. I would love it if you care to dispell that, and give some insight to her as a person?
Oh she was hilarious! She had such a great sense of humour and was seriously like a little kid: always playing jokes on people, just being a little shit. She was always up to something. If a booking with her was happening (at least in my early days of working with her, she had about a year's worth of work on me) you knew you were in for some sort of entertainment at someone elses expense. Her wit was unparalelled, and like a little kid getting their hands slapped for misbehaving. I was on one of my first go see's for Glamour magazine, at John Stember's studio when I saw her first in person, and as she was getting made up. She just terrorized the make-up artist named Joey Mills by sticking straws between his legs while he was working You could see his growing frustration as she kept poking him with straws as he told her to stop, and I can still just just hear her laughing as she kept at it. (Joey was also the make-up artist for the models in a Faye Dunaway film "Eyes of Laura Mars")

I have always loved seeing the photographs of her laughing and smiling, you can just tell she had troublemaker written all over her face!
Oh GOD did she ever! Even though she and I were both polar opposites (I was shy and she was very outgoing) she really just enjoyed and got a big kick out of life and loved to have fun. She really almost have you a kind of permission to not take yourself or life too seriously. She just seriously was such a lovely woman.

I had read somewhere that she once gave another model a grape laced with ipecac.
(Eva laughs) I don't know if that is really true, but I wouldn't have put it past her. She was always up to something.

Now I remember you once mentioned on your website about a trip to Jackson Hole, Wyoming with Gia. You never went into details, but you said she was in top form for that trip.
(Eva laughs again). Yep. Ok, it was myself, Gia, Barbara Minty (wife of the late Steve McQueen) and Rico Pullman for American Bazaar. We had just finished working for the day and Gia invited me up to her hotel room to visit with her as she was writing postcards to people. One of them, was a postcard that she was mailing to her agency which was a photograph of a river, a rive of nothing but white rapids...and on the card she signed "Having fun at the bottom of the river, wish you were here. Gia" that was just the type of person she was. Her humor was just twisted sometimes.

Gia off hours.

When she was off assignment, she dressed down pretty masculine: tshirt and jeans. No makeup. She looked like a pretty BOY more than anything, not this sexy model. She was also short, around 5'8, just this dinky little thing with a beautiful figure.

After the assignment was completed, and we were heading to the airport, I wasn't prepared for what was about to happen next. Like I emphasize, I seriously was this easily scared and shy young woman. Gia wasn't out of control at that point in her career (in the sense of her later acquired heroin addiction) but again she was all about having fun no matter the cost. So we're at the security gates putting our luggage on the belt and we were asked if we had anything to claim as far as a weapon might go.

Gia announced she had a gun.

I was mortified, felt my heart stop, not to mention the blood leaving me completely so I am sure I was as white as a sheet.

"Gia!" I was tugging at her. "We're going to get in trouble!" I was scared.

"Oh don't worry about it!" she laughed. "Nothing is going to happen!" and as we made our way to the gates, there were all sorts of security people following us around.

Then, this girl who not many hours before was painted up within an inch of her life, looking like a glamour girl, walked up to a man reading a Cosmo magazine, of which she was on the cover and in not so many words let them know it was her on the cover, which in of itself was hilarious because the contrast of the girl on the cover compared to who was standing in front of them was seriously like night and day.

Then the troubles began...
The modeling industry in no way shape or form, is known for prevention much less looking out for the models. I watched girls with substance abuse issues function, but then again all that mattered at the end of the day was getting that photograph out of the model. I recall a photographer laughing once about a model nearly having a breakdown on a shoot, and the photographer basically said he needed the shot, all this emotional stuff can happen later they have a deadline to meet. No one helped these girls at all.

Gia began to fall apart, and the people around her didn't do anything to help her. Throwing her a job wasn't going to help her either. She created a new genre of model, and became a legend in many respects, and many of them for the wrong reasons. Her girlfriend was also a peer and at the time looked a lot like Debbie Harry (who Gia liked), and it is known that their relationship was a roller coaster. It upsets me that to this day, that this woman is making money giving interviews about Gia and saying "Oh she was this and she was so great..." and in the day, she did absolutely nothing to help Gia. To the best of my knowledge, I don't believe some of the photographers and clients she may have worked for did either. So, these people who were supposedly close to her are now saying "We didn't know the extent..." upsets me, because it is untruthful and completely disrespects who Gia was as a person. This was a person in pain and someone who needed help, and they did nothing. The glorification of her bothers me. She was a human being who had a problem, why focus on that problem still? Focus on the person.

Several times, she was trying to make a comeback after she had burned the bridges she had due to her drug use. I would hear "Gia was here today, trying to get some pictures taken."
It saddens and sickens me, that for as much money that she made for people, the body of work that she did which though was brief (she was on the top of her game and hit there very quickly) that no one was there when she died. She died alone, a welfare case in a hospital. I didn't know what was going on with her health until after she passed away, and even though we were not the best of friends she was someone I admired and respected. Had I known what she was going through, being the type of person I am...I would have made an effort to see her and let her know she wasn't forgotten and that someone she worked with cared that she was sick and alone. That is just my personality.

Eva Voorhees for Fantasticsmag May 2010

How do you feel that in the present time, we will be able to combat this epidemic?
I wish the religious fanatics would take a step outside, and see what it is they are doing to not help matters any when it comes to the crisis. We know exactly what it takes for prevention, it is 2010. We have known for years what can be done to curb the disease and perhaps send the numbers into retreat. But when you have someone like the Pope not doing anything to be of help, with his head stuck in another era...well, that is so dangerous! You cannot be a figure, a figure that perhaps people in the countries who are really in dire straits with the illness, is a figure that other than their families is all they know: they have no education and all they know is their religion. You cannot go into these countries and fuel the ignorance by not giving them the tools which have been proven to save lives. The information out there about prevention saves lives, and you have a Pope who says that condoms make the epidemic worse and does nothing as his flock dies from lack of information? How can he sleep at night feeling he has really done his job? Oh don't even get me started, as it just makes me furious! We have countries that need not only financial help and medication, but the Pope would help SO much if he just went into these countries and assessed the fact that these people are not of a Western lifestyle and take that into account, these cultures and help them. There is so much that could be done, and it isn't being done.

Well, there you have it folks. Had Eva been on a pulpit in all of her passion answering that last question, I would have been happy to be there in a picture hat front row to cheer her on. She is so right, we have so much more that we need to do to combat and eradicate AIDS on the planet. I really enjoyed my chat her and I am so blessed that she allowed me to visit with her like she did. What a sweetie! I want thank Eva for allowing me to pry!

You all can sure as hell count on me to continue going on treasure hunts for magazines to scan and spread to help Eva in her quest to preserve the legacies of people that we may have forgotten for a number of reasons in the fashion industry. All she has to do is put the idea out there like a treasure hunt, and I will gladly see what I can do. To find out more about Eva's work, her websites, and what not here are some links:

I got some background information from her interview with FantasticsMag, which I hope they won't be angry that I borrowed some of her words and the collage.

Her personal website is an excellent portfolio of her work.

Then of course, is her archives for supermodels that will eventually be the best resource for photographs of vintage models: supermodelicons.com

Also, if you're a fashion fan like she and I are and you have some photos of models you haven't seen on the internet, you can contact her on supermodelicons.com or on her facebook page dedicated to preservation, and post the pictures. She'll more than likely not only tell you hello, but if you have questions about the business...if you're patient and polite, this firecracker will answer them as best as she can.

Well, this wraps up my World AIDS Day entry, and I had so much fun putting it together. Now, it wouldn't be an HIV related entry, without me plugging the M.A.C AIDS Fund lipsticks. Remember that 100% of the proceeds from a Viva Glam lipstick or lipgloss go to the M.A.C AIDS Fund, which has raised multi millions to help men, women, and children living with or affected by HIV. The holidays are coming, and something from the line (right now it's a Tartan story for Christmas!) I can honestly say that I have seen programs flourish, from the grant that M.A.C gives them.

So get your Viva Glam on, help a cause, and look fabulous while doing so.

Thanks to Eva and all my readers!! xoxoxo

Tomorrow....

2010-12-01T20:00:00.000-08:00

Will be the entry you have been waiting for and that I have been talking about. My computer is on the fritz so it will be a day late! How fun, huh? Just when I had a project to finish up, it messes with me! Oh well, will be all posted tomorrow!

Random Bits of Thought (part 2)

2010-11-19T18:52:00.000-08:00

I forgot about these pics from my visit to the coast last month. Benson and Lily are too adorable! Little supermodels!

Projects...projects...I am enjoying being busy!

World AIDS Day is December 1st, and for all my vintage fashionista folks and readers in general I have a really exciting entry (hopefully, it is still in the works) for that day that I am just bubbling over with excitement and anticipation that I hopefully will be able to pull off on that date, if not it will be withing the week of the 1st. Let's just say ladies, that I am forever in debt to artists out there who so kindly indulge me and satisfy my curiosity. So..I have a hint for ya: she is an artist and has had a very high profile and successful career in fashion and your Mazzy Boy gets to pick her brain and not only talk "shop", but also to remind us about the early years of the AIDS epidemic and how it affected her work and the people she knew in those days. You will all hear the story of how we crossed paths only recently, and how this extremely sweet and enthusiastic woman gave a gushing fan of her genre, an awesome chance to really test out his writing.

I wish that you all could know the HUGE relief it is to me knowing that Debbie will babysit Lily so I can attend school. That takes such a weight off my shoulders! Now I can finally soldier on, and it opens up more options to me for where I wish to attend. I seriously could never be more thankful!

Since 2011 is going to be here in just over a month, it has been nice to set the goal for school and getting it narrowed down. In fact a whole overhaul is going to happen if I am able to wing it: I am going to finish decorating my apartment and get my teeth fixed. I can't start school and become a certified makeup artist without teeth that glow in the dark! So hopefully I'll be able to start school in spring or summer. It gives me six months to get all the grants and loans all worked out as well. So, I have a goal to meet and I intend to follow through, and now that I won't have to worry about my babygirl, it makes it SO much easier!

My doctor is in Africa right now until December 8th, working at an HIV clinic for those in need. She has a heart of gold, is a snappy modern dresser, fabulous personality, is first generation Greek-American, and has a hug for her clients all the time. My comrades over in Africa have someone working with them who has such a heart for people afflicted with the disease.

Running into her on the train one day after she got off work and I hadn't been in to see her (I was participating in a medical drug study for people with HIV/AIDS for 2 different clinical trials, so not only was I financially compensated nicely, the companies paid for ALL of the various tests coming from my body in various forms) so she hugged me and was giddy because she was going to a family wedding in Napa Valley.

"You know that movie 'My Big Fat Greek Wedding'?" she laughed. "Well, lets just say on many levels I can relate. By the way I haven't seen you in months, just make an appointment to come in and see me or email me or SOMETHING! I'd like to know how you're doing." and she hugged me goodbye.

So, she's not there when I called in to have my prescriptions filled and another doctor has to sign off on them.

The doctor who signed off on my refill requests has to be the only doctor that treats the HIV community (and my clinic isn't just the only one in town offering Primary Care for poz people either and I know who all the doctors are by name) that no one seems to get along with, or like. A gay man himself, he almost seems to really have a personal dislike for not only the segment of the HIV population who use narcotics of any sort, whether they abuse them or not or those who have their medical marijuana card (of which I possess), but others complain that he just isn't a personable doctor and perhaps he is just as uncomfortable with the community. I have never had to deal with him until now.

I get 10 xanax a month, at .5 milligrams. What can I say? It takes the edge off if I am in a place with a lot of people I do not know. Sobriety replaced the party animal with anxiety and if I am unable to smoke a joint in the event that I am going to, well I have this prescription. So, I have what I like to call "Mazzy's little helpers." They don't fuck me up. I don't always have them on me and I think what makes the anxiety accelerate is that I get extremely paranoid about what happens: I break out into a sweat and I get upset that it is happening.

So, somedays people have been known to ask "Is it raining outside?"

I have had this prescription off and on for nearly 4 years and he wrote a questioning note in my file wondering why I need it. Ummm, could he maybe look into my medical chart seeing as how he's making a notation in it?

Am I turning into Winona Ryder?

Whatever. If he doesn't refill them, he doesn't refill them. I'm not going to make a stink about it, and take into consideration his concern and talk to my doctor about an alternative option. Not like I really enjoy

The two things I want removed from my being, would be insomnia and anxiety.

HIV funding in this state cut "complimentary" medicine, such as going to a naturopath and getting herbs, tinctures, and acupuncture. Oh how I miss going in for my acupuncture sessions! I'd wake up early morning, make some chamomile tea and catch train to my appointment. I'd take my iPod with me to listen to some vintage jazz (that new age music always makes me feel like I'm in some Chow Yung Fat movie and that I'm doing Tai Chi or whatever...plus it makes me sick) left feeling relaxed, come home and shower and then take a nap for an hour and the day is filled with endless opportunities for projects.

Lily went to the groomer today, and she looks so sassy!

So, someone sent this to me in my email and I thought it was entertaining to justify why you have the music you have on your mp3 player or iPod and have it on shuffle or random. So, ya write about 13 songs it selects at random and what got you interested in the band. Who knows, maybe someone you know might check out someone they've never heard of. Also, how random can the selection show as an example of your varied tastes? They aint planned ya know! And if the track playing should be one you may be embarrassed about, own up to it!

1. "Baby Britain (remix)" from "B-Sides and Other Songs" by Elliot Smith.

Oh Mr. Smith. Something about the area of the USA that I come from, really seems to breed tortured musicians who die very young, leaving a lasting impact on the indie music scene. Though Elliot wasn't an Oregon native, he made Portland his home. That voice of his was heard on the soundtrack to "Good Will Hunting" in the form of a song called "Miss Misery". What can I say? Film director Gus Van Sant, in his early years formed my craving for another world, a world that was shown through his lens. I had always hoped that Gus would base all of his films in Portland, much like John Waters has done for Baltimore. Something about Gus using Oregon as basis for his inspiration, fuels that dreamland I have in my mind. Elliot, with his sweet voice and moody and at the same time catchy lyrics would be in the soundtrack of my life. I'm a huge fan of his work, and sadly he was taken from us much too soon.

2. "No Feelings" from "Deep Sea Skiving" by Bananarama.

What can I say? I have been a Bananarama fan since I was probably about 6 or 7 years old, when I first heard their song "Shy Boy" (which is on this album, and I own all of their releases. The last being in 2009) in the movie "Valley Girl" from like 1982. A new wave trio at the time, they have always been known as a band that covered other people's songs, in addition to their own. "No Feelings" was recorded in 1981, and is on a re-release of the LP, which has been remastered and has all the rare B-Sides. I was EXTREMELY excited to get this new CD, because not only was it out of print and I had an original pressing at one point, but the song "No Feelings" is my favourite song by the Sex Pistols and since I never owned any singles from this album from back then, this was such a treat. Though they now are known in the gay scene for their dance music, Bananarama had pretty cool punk cred. to their existence, when they palled around with Paul Cook (drummer of the Sex Pistols) who produced some tracks this debut (yep, can you believe this poofy fag likes to annoy my neighbours after being woken up to annoying new age music with Sid Vicious singing "My Way"??). Now a duet instead of a trio, Bananarama is being kept alive by the gay boys in the clubs, and I still have their music. Some people you grow up with and never get rid of, and Bananarama would be that group for me.

3. "She Don't" from the album "LeToya" by LeToya Luckett.

I wouldn't call myself an extremely BIG fan of Destiny's Child, only because Beyonce annoys the shit out of me. I also think that if you were a founding member of a band, and you find out that you're out of that band by turning on the TV and seeing someone else mouthing your voice to a song that would eventually land you a Grammy in what was deemed the video "World Premiere", well...I'd be pissed too and that is what happened to LeToya Luckett when she turned on the TV to see the debut of DC's "Say My Name". Call me the guy that roots for the underdog, but I have always thought that was one of the SHITTIEST things I have ever been aware happening to someone, and it wasn't a personal friend. Can you imagine? So, I have always been curious as to what happened to the girls that were kicked out of the band, and hoped that their solo music stood on it's own compared to their previous work as a group. LeToya proved slick in reinventing herself (as the H-Town Chick) and to this day is the only other member of that band that has had an album debut at #1, much less sell respectfully. My hat is off to her.

4. "Rockin' Back Inside My Heart" from the album "Floating Into the Night" by Julee Cruise.

Many years ago, there was a relevant director in Hollywood that goes by the name of David Lynch, who by proxy should be a director that I should be crazy about. In all honesty, his movies annoy the shit out of me and I don't think he is brilliant or a genius. Then again, I adore John Waters so who am I to judge? The only one movie that I have liked, was a film he did for Disney (can you believe he did one for them?) called "The Straight Story" about a little old man who rides a lawnmower to see his sick and dying cousin, across country (based on a true story). Julee Cruise, was a protege of Lynch, and the album this track is from reflects his influence, which is where I pretty much only can enjoy his influence. He helped write and produce the music on this album, which predates this whole Amy Winehouse/Duffy phenomenon of 60's sounding contemporary singers, and this album was released in 1989. Which goes to show how idiotic music reviewers are in their lack of knowledge when it comes to a specific genre (though I am not claiming to be an expert). Fans of Lynch will recognize her voice, as the dreamy voice who sang 'Falling', which was the theme to "Twin Peaks". In the early 90's, the USA channel on the weekends had an oddity television show that played all night from 11pm until about 5am, called "Night Flight", which was music videos and random odd underground and b movie crap that the producers could come up with. This is where I first heard this track, and a couple of years ago heard it again and had to get the album. I now have everything of hers that I can find.

5. "X Offender" from a bootleg CD "Live at the Old Waldorf: San Francisco 9/21/1977" by Blondie.

What a sweet little gem this song is, I'd take anyone out who wouldn't agree with me that Debbie Harry wasn't quite the dish back in the day, and is still one of the coolest women on the planet. I have every album of this group (excluding stupid remixes) though am not a fan of any of Harry's solo work.

6. "Pack Up" from the self titled debut album by Eliza Doolittle.

This delightful girl, sounds like Lily Allen but isn't as cynical. Her bouncy little jazzy pop is fun without being nauseating, and she's a cutie pie I must say! I am curious as to how she'll do here stateside if they release her. Sometimes for the hell of it, I'll go to the Billboard website, to check on charts around the world and see what is playing on the radio that of course can cure my annoyance I always have with music in the USA that we are being fed, and thats where I discovered Eliza, who is enjoying some success in her native UK. I've really enjoyed having this on rotation since the middle of summer when I discovered her.

7. "Quelque Jour" from the album "Russian Doll" by Violet Indiana

Siobhan de Mare, vocalist from the trip hop band Mono and Simon Raymond of Cocteau Twins fame formed a nice little indie experiment. It's nice to hear some of the guitar work I associate with Simon from his years with CT. The music is something that would be lovely to hear in a smokey lounge on a winter evening, with everyone having a hot buttered rum. Siobhan isn't the strongest vocalist, but then again I am sadly pitting her against CT's Elizabeth Fraser, who I think has one of the most beautiful and versatile voices ever to be recorded in music. But she can hold her own, and I'm glad to be part of the fanbase.

8. "Breathe" from the album "Genetic World" by Telepopmusik

I love good dance music, in particular a lot of french electronic music and this song is a classic dreamy/whispery house ditty example of a gem in my collection. The whole album is fabulous.

9. "Keep On Boys" from the album "Lesser Matters" by The Radio Dept.

This dreamy band I discovered a few years ago when Sofia Capolla directed "Marie Antoinette". I have never been a fan of her films, and this film is my favourite and how could I not love it? The costumes...the corsets...the wigs...and the setting! They actually got to film in Versailles, and the soundtrack of modern tunes of a new wave nature and experimental music was a brilliant marriage in my opinion. The introduction of this band though was a treat, as the singer has such a sweet and dreamy voice and the scene in the film in which it played was filmed beautifully on the grounds of the palace...what a delight.

9. "Pussycat Meow! (the meow mix)" from the album "Pussycat Meow (single)" by Deee-Lite

Deee-Lite would probably be the one band that I have everything that was released both domestic and foreign because they're such a novelty that I adore. Deee-Lite hit when I was 14 years old (Oh my GOD! 20 years of me loving Lady Miss Kier in her platforms and wigs!) and I loved them more than the B-52's (a band I now respect) in those days. Deee-Lite is one of those bands that will forever have a place in dance music, and it is sad that only one song of theirs (Groove Is In the Heart) became so well known outside of nightclubs and underground parties. Purring in interviews that drag queens taught her how to be glamorous, I just couldn't get enough of this soulful white girl in the cutest outfits. Her co-stars in the act, Towa Tei and Supa DJ Dmitry blended excellent grooves together while carving out their own niche in New York's dance music/club scene. Novelty cannot begin to describe them, and finding everything that they ever released wasn't easy, but when I did I can say I have NEVER felt more complete! It REALLY makes me miss the days when you could get together in a funky outfit with friends and go dancing because you LOVED and LIVED for it. Deee-Lite hopefully will be playing on the dancefloor in the skies when I get there.

10. "Gimme a Pigfoot" from the album "The Collection" by Bessie Smith.

A woman who if I had ever gotten to meet her back in the day (this track is from 1924), I would have fallen flat at her feet and blurted "You dear old fucking miracle! What can I get you to drink?" and I'd wait on her hand and foot, just in hopes she'd belt something out...this or "Aggravatin' Papa". Bessie was a brassy ebony Mama, who REALLY sang the blues in juke joints all over the south and Mama had SOMETHING to say about the men who did her wrong, and the hooch she knocked back to get through her days..."...do the shim-sham shimmy, til the risin' sun. Gimme a reefer and a gang a gin, save me cuz I'm in my sin...save me cuz I'm full of gin", she closes the song with after talking about the boys getting full of corn liquor after checking their razors and guns, and she's gonna get down. Janis Joplin's world was never the same she said when discovering Smith, and you can hear her homage when she sings. I loves my Billie Holiday (Lady Day) and my Bessie.

11. "Where Life Begins" from the album "Erotica" by Madonna.

Obviously my gayness again shines through on this random selection. Music is one of those things that when you hear a song, you are taken back to a particular time. Madonna as I have said before does this for me. If you're a gay man, every song by her can put you back someplace if you've been around since 1982 (Like a Virgin was my first LP that I ever saved up and bought myself, to my father's dismay.) I grew up with her. So, when this album was released, it was my junior year in highschool, I had come out of the closet and dropping LSD at school with girlfriends from different cliques, and loving Madonna. I also was also lying to my parents so friends and I could drive to Portland to the infamous "City Nightclub" (Portland really had a young gay scene that rivaled New York and Los Angeles, this club was named the #1 club in Portland for many years by Details magazine) an all age gay night club, and we were flipping through Madonna's X Rated "Sex" book (something my father begged me not to buy, and I of course 'respected' his wishes). Basically, every perverted fantasy of Madonna's was in every form of medium: this album, her book, and a rip off of 'Basic Instinct' in the form of a Portland filmed flick 'Body of Evidence' and her gays snapped it up. This particular song from the album received a lot of coverage, was a spoken and sung track ( a la Justify My Love) paying homage to the delights of having someone eat her out ' Now what could be better than a home cooked meal? How ya wanna eat it, depends on how you feel.' This is one of her most underrated albums. I can almost hear Liz screeching "Bad Girl..."

12 "Driving With Linda" from the porno "Deep Throat: The Soundtrack", unknown composer.

Oh how much I love the film that this track is from. Jenn's late and fabulous Granny had a funny and bawdy side. Her name was Tressa, and sometimes with her girlfriends back in the day they would have a night known as "Tressa Tuesdays" that involved watching classic pornographic movies and having margaritas. And having been in the presence of one of the most lovely women, I can only imagine how hilarious those nights were. Her grandmother was one of the sweetest women I have ever met, and bless that woman...she was a FIRECRACKER! So, one year she gave Jenn (her first grandchild for many years and best friend) a box of her dirty gag gifts and porno flicks that she had collected over the years and that Christmas Jenn had a gathering of the usual suspects (her and Justin weren't married yet, Sue, Jolie, and myself) and we had cocktails, played a very twisted version of the game "Clue" (where all murder weapons were something like crotchless panties, vibrators, and strap ons...and keep in mind we had these actual objects to 'examine' in trying to solve the crime. the suspects were all of us plus Jenn's pets,.In the end, the murderer ended up being Maty, Jenn's sweet and adorable cat killing with a big black dong) and watched "Deep Throat". What can I say? I'll always not only think of Jenn's Granny as a classy broad with a hilarious sense of humour, but I can say it was her that showed me 'the classics'. Several years later, I cannot recall what Jenn was doing online but she bought the soundtrack and we had it one year for Christmas, because she recalled we got a big kick out of the music.. Too funny, every time I hear Linda Lovelace on this soundtrack cooing "Oh doctor YOUNG!" as on the screen she was being nailed by Harry Reems, I think of Granny and her smile, and I know she'd love that!

13. "Sugar" from the album "Lady Day: The Complete Billie Holiday on Columbia 1933-1944"

This happy little jazzy tune, about how she's a sweet lady to her man and how in love she is with him...."He's special ration!" Lady Day coos. I am in the process of trying to collect every track that is out there of hers, because I adore her that much. Her catalog is so immense, and I cannot even begin to know the lyrics to all of the songs she has ever performed, but I am absolutely entranced by her voice and her legend. Her latter years in voice (I have an album called "Lady In Satin", a very orchestra and strings affair) are so haunting, not only because of all that she had endured in life but because of her substance abuse completely altered her voice. I don't believe in addiction as being a disease, perhaps a person in that state is unwell (I know I was) for a variety of reasons, but I find it just as tragic that when she died, the only money-her estate was taped to her thigh: 750.00, money she had been paid for an interview from a tabloid. She already had been arrested on her deathbed for a narcotics possession charge. Late in the evening, like right now as I type this and my mood is mellow...nothing is better than Billie.

Random Bits of Thought...

2010-11-14T15:52:00.000-08:00

Supermodel Gia Carangi, Supermodel Patti Hansen (wife of Keith Richards), Makeup Artist Sandy Linter (Gia's lover at the time) and Supermodel Juli Foster for Interview magazine, 1979 by Michael Tighe. Hair by Bill King.

Well, Thanksgiving is just around the corner and I am blessed to be spending it with my family this year.

What would a holiday season be, without me bitching about something? It's like sugar for a cake recipe, it has to happen.

And it's going to happen.

This year I have to say that to all of you out there in the bloggersphere (and friends in person as well) that have been coming by my little page, I want you all to know that no matter what may be causing chaos in your lives, I'm glad you come by and let me make you smile. I hope that with many of you having family issues, that somehow this season everyone can come together and have a moment of positive reflection.

There, that's the only fucking Hallmark greeting card any of you are getting out of me today. I REALLY need to bitch!

I have a dream. It involves rhinestones. It involves Lily. It involves Lily wearing rhinestones, and I am extremely upset and let down that the pet stores in a city that is known to be funky and fun for fashion, that Portland has done nothing but let me down in finding that PERFECT rhinestone collar for my Shih-Tzu.

"Go on the internet..." everyone says.

I'm not going crazy, am I? (RHETORICAL QUESTION, BITCHES!)

Since Lily is with me 90% of the time, that shopping indulgence has been eating at me for months. Just one collar, with nothing but solid white rhinestones that I can snap up in person and not have to wait for? Though I love shopping online, for some reason when it comes to all things sparkles, I think one must meditate on it in their hands before the purchase. It may be a collar but it is jewelry in my mind after all!

4 of the shops I have been to, REALLY let me down because it was obvious the guys who own them are what I would refer to as "the girls" (makes me seem very butch) and you would think these very people would carry such a thing, but even their inventory was rather boring. I went into Juicy Couture while I happened to be downtown when I walked past, knowing that they make pet accessories, beds, etc. Maybe they'd have a cute charm necklace for a dog (they didn't). I did find a couple collars that had some bling value, but not enough. You'd think if those horrible blinged carriers they make were over the top, they'd do the same to a collar.

Oh was it always thus?

Why is there such an urgency into making my dog sparkle?

Thanksgiving is especially a treat for me, because I get to see my Great Aunt Lita, a spitfire at 92 still. This lovely first generation German-American was always the glamourous one in the family and since the 1950's has smelled of Estee Lauder's "Youth Dew". She also had lapdogs and Cocker Spaniels that had jackets and pearls that they wore when they went out.

Mostly I get these little sparkly things not only for me, but I save the really cutsie things that I have just for when Lily gets to see Aunt Lita, as it brings a smile to her face and offsets the fact that Lily is busy terrorizing my mother's 11 year old Shih-Tzu Heidi, who has been an old woman lapdog since she was born...all she wants is a nap. Poor Heidi in her old age, is a sweet little girl but she's no match for Lily in energy.

While on the subject of perfume, I paid a visit to a local institution in the Hawthorne area of town called "The Perfume House". Dimly lit, temperature controlled to extremely cool, like an old parlour this place was filled to the brim with perfume, many of them discontinued and hard to find, some of them only available in Oregon at this shop. I was particularly excited to smell a Paco Rabanne perfume called "Metal", which I remember reading about in an article written by a woman who would go to the ends of earth to find this discontinued scent. I wish to GOD I could recall the magazine and the writer, I'd let her know this place has a few bottles of it in their cooled cases. The lady at the counter and I both discussed how interesting it is going to be when Guerlains' "Shalimar" is re-launched, because there will be some changes to the original formula of the perfume. This classic oriental screams FLAPPER to me, and though there have been twists on the original fragrance for a more modern take for younger women, to completely re-invent a classic has me curious. I also got to smell some exremely rare fragrances by the same company.

Fragrance is fabulous and I would bathe in it if I could, but for many years I have leaned towards scents that are classics in their own right and have their own following, but also would be scents that not many people would be wearing. I live to find fragrances in the most obscure places that I know not many people will be wearing. It brings mystery, I feel!

Curious as to see what you all would say your signature scent is. Do you change them by the season?

To change the topics...

I haven't said much, about the recent suicides that have been happening with gay youth all across the United States in the past couple of months.

It kills me to think, that these young people couldn't find self empowerment to be a human being because they couldn't take the bullying anymore. With technology being what it is nowadays, bullying has taken on so many more twisted forms of attack: facebook, websites, etc...kids posting hateful things about their classmates, cell phones, texts, etc. Bullying obviously isn't anything new, but the extremes that people are going, sadden me.

The absolute worst death, was that poor young teenager who was in college. He hadn't even finished out his fall term, when he discovered that his roommate had filmed him having sex with another man and then posted it on the internet. He wasn't out, and this was how he was outed. He threw himself from a bridge and drowned himself a couple months ago in New York. So sad. All of these kids, who are bullied for whatever reasons, I just wish I could hug them and let them know that by the time they leave school, that none of it is going to matter anymore...things do get better. But this is only something I myself learned from experience. My thick skin grew the day when I accepted who I was and continued to fight back. I was a loose cannon by that point, and NO one fucked with me anymore. I would see red, and explode. My vocabulary being not only my defense, but my ultimate weapon. It is really sad in retrospect, that in order to survive, that a person who is otherwise good hearted, and kind, has to learn that sometimes turning the other cheek and ignoring what people say really does nothing (despite what you are told) and that you have to launch a counter assault either or both physically or verbally.

It's sad that the toxic emotions like that, had to defend myself back in the day.

Oh but these children, these young kids who had their whole lives ahead of them filled with such self hatred because of what people say to them. I can still relate, though it has been well over a decade since I left school, I can recall almost too clearly some of the things that were said to me. Though it is odd, because years later those same people who were so awful to me were some of the same people who later told me I was fabulous when I ran into them at parties or an event. The tables may have turned, but the glass was still half empty in my book.

Though, my latter years in highschool weren't bad at all. I survived it, and had many friends from different cliques. I walked out of that school a cheerleader and literally still in my uniform. Me, the person who when he entered that school, avoided everyone like the plague and listened to the comments, walked out with his self esteem somewhat intact, and in a sports uniform. Funny how things happen. I just wish for these teenagers that I could be the one to defend them, knowing what it is that I do now (and the zingers that fly out of my mouth have only improved with age as we all know). I just wish that they had known that once school was over, that no matter what they will never have to justify who they are to those people who were hurting them.

Sad. So sad. It doesn't need to be like this. I wonder, if the teachers themselves have forgotten what those years were like for themselves. Were they the biggest geek in school? Were they the popular kid? Were they the girl who looked like a guy or the guy who sounded like a girl? Hmmm. I cannot stop thinking about it. They seriously shouldn't have ever felt alone.

Debbie and I went out and about today, and I talked to her about my wanting to go to school. I finally have narrowed it down to the 2 schools that I really want to be at as well as the a "finishing" school for more advanced Esthetics. Debbie even said she would look after Lily while I was at school, which SERIOUSLY takes a weight off my shoulders. Afterwards, I'll decide if I want to either work in a salon/spa or teach at a school. Who knows, I could probably do both. I'll get my degree, move to the coast, and teach at one of those little mom and pop schools and stir up the cirriculum.

As we ran about the rainy city, we had Lola and Lily with us both. Lola is getting very whiny about wanting to sit in the front seat, shotgun while Debbie drives...it's hilarious! She's a hoot, every time I am walking her or we take her to the pet store, she gets SO excited, wiggly, and whines when she meets new people. If they look at her that's one thing, but if they address her, she just turns into a wiggle worm, the sweetie. Lily gets really excited when I say we're going to see Lola, and tends to become VERY vocal if we don't leave right away, and she pulls me the 3 blocks to Debbie's house. She knows exactly where she's going! Debbie's cats have become so tolerant of Lily, but Lily has one that she's especially attached to, the orange tabby named Redford. She follows Redford around and whines as he just ignores her and occasionally protests in a meow that sounds like "Oh for God's SAKE...." as he just basically has resorted himself to the fact that she's not going anywhere. He'll come sit on my lap and Lily will sniff him out and encourage him to play, but he wants nothing to do with playing. Nonetheless, I have lost count of the day number that it is that Debbie has had Lola in her grip, and it has been that long that she daily goes to the store and gets her a new toy or some treat.

I did neglect to write, that the day before Halloween when Debbie and I were in the kitchen carving pumpkins, Lola's former drunken owner called to say he was going to rehab for drinking. As soon as Debbie and I realized who her husband was talking to on the phone, with knives in our hands as if we were ready to fight someone, we both muttered loud enough for her husband Dewey to hear "The bastard isn't getting her back!"

Meanwhile in Gayville...

It's going to happen, and nothing is going to stop it. After a long time of not seeing one another (quite a few years in fact) for a long time, Liz and I have finally decided to kick in our 30's (our birthdays are a few days apart...she's going to be 31 and I'll be COUGH! 35) together, and Lily and I will be hopping the train to Seattle to see her. I cannot even begin to contain my excitement. On top of that, Corinne will be there too (which is always a bonus, and she was my roommate in Boise) so it seriously will be an exciting time. I already have cooking ideas in mind, as it seriously never was a get together with the three of us without some time bonding in the kitchen. It will also be nice to finally meet Liz's husband Josh.

Nervous? A little bit. But I need to remember that whatever is in our past, just is that: in the past. Liz, Corinne, and myself are in much different spaces in our lives so I don't know why I should be nervous, but then again I have been getting that way when I haven't seen people since I quit using drugs. It will be even more interesting, because I haven't seen Seattle since I left there in the beginning of 1999, it's been over 11 years since I have even set foot in that city so it should be interesting. I have a feeling that as soon as Liz picks me up, I'm going to have her drive me straight to Dick's Hamburger's so I can wolf down a deluxe...how funny! When I used to live there I would eat there at least once a week because they were open late and we'd go there after the bars close. Oddly enough, I'm not really going to have much of an interest in going to many of my old haunts...well, that's not true. I wouldn't mind having a nice romp through Gasworks Park with Lily and take some pictures from the docks (and for old times sake, I'll have to roll a joint) of the view. Pike Place Market is such a tourist trap, and it was when I lived there in the 90's, so I can only imagine the nightmare that it must be now.

Oddly enough, I don't really know anyone who lives there anymore.

Who knows, I'll just be along for the ride...but since Liz lives in the suburbs of Seattle and it is much quieter where she is, I'll enjoy that more. Nothing like getting out of the city to where it is quiet. Sadly our birthdays fall in winter (well, in this part of the hemisphere) and the Pacific Northwest is one great big puddle (shout out to all those people who rejoice running around and splashing puddles in 'liquid sunshine', I'd enjoy laxative tea more!) so it should be interesting to take in that area of the NW that I once inhabited.

Le sigh...so much to look forward to in the coming weeks!

Nothing

2010-11-10T15:25:00.000-08:00

Nothing to blog about for the time being...am super busy and working and a project for World AIDS Day on December 1st here on the website (and hopefully, if it all turns out right, then it will be a FABULOUS entry!). I'll write in a few days, after the construction in my building finally calms down.

But all I can say is that I am excited to be writing and working on my entry for that date.

I'll post Halloween pics later.

Edie Sedgwick in "Ciao Manhattan": Screen captures by Me

2010-10-30T21:36:00.000-07:00

Always said you were a Youthquaker, Edie
A stormy little world shaker
Warhol's darling queen, Edie
An angel with a broken wing

The dogs lay at your feet, Edie
We carressed you cheek
Stars wrapped in your hair, Edie
Life without a care
But you're not there
You're never there

Caught up in an endless scene
Paradise a shattered dream
Why'd all the shit you took, Edie
Your innocence dripped blood, sweet child

Sweet little sugar talker
Paradise dream stealer
Warhol's Darling queen, Edie
Innocence dripped blood, sweet child

Why did you kiss the world goodbye
Ciao Baby
Don't you know paradise takes time
It takes time, but your not there
Fade away now
But your not there
Ciao Edie

(How could I NOT be inspired by this woman??)

On and On...

2010-10-27T16:06:00.000-07:00

A fabulous friend and I both share a philosophy on rain. Though I don't know her EXACT feelings on autumn in general, I have a feeling that like me she loves the colour changes and the crispness of it. The smell, and all that comes with it....except for the fucking rain.

Rainy days can sometimes symbolize a shitty day period. End of story. Ya get wet, ya got groceries and a dog/child, and ya have to hail the train or bus.

Lord rape me now, will you?

I hadn't talked to Jolie since right before I headed to the woods, and knew I had to call her Monday. It was raining and I had just returned to drop Lola off at Debbie's after washing her at the walk in doggy salon. As soon as she picked up the phone, I could hear in her voice that something was really wrong. She had to put her cat Zappa to sleep. I have known Jolie since I was 12 years old (nearly 23 years) and She got that cat when I was 17. So, obviously in essence this is an animal who had a place in my life, as the beloved pet of one of my best friends.

So I went over and smoked some reefer with her, and shared our memories of the kitty. Zappa, was put to sleep in Jolie's arms after being in such pain and not being able to move. And for the first time in her life, my best friend experienced the loss of a pet that she had had, for half of her life. A cat that moved with her the numerous times Jolie moved for various reasons, a cat that was there when Jolie got married, so in not hearing her little voice talking to us while visiting, was unnerving.

Then Jolie brightened up for a few minutes and asked what I was doing for Halloween and then ran into her bedroom to grab her costume and asked me to guess what she was going as. In her hand, she was holding a vintage early 1960's pencil skirt suit.

"Tippi Hedren in 'The Birds' right?"

Bingo! I got it, and for a good fifteen minutes my friend was bubbly and we discussed all the birds her wig was going to be representing. I know she's got some gaudy costume jewelry that will be fabulous for when she hands out candy as Melanie Daniels.

I just wanted to be her sounding board and share my memories of her cat, which she needed to hear and know that she did the right thing. The cat was nearly 18 years old, bless her. Jenn and Justin have cats almost as old as Zappa was, as well as my friend Trina and it makes me worried about the near future. Just makes me sad...again, I can envision myself as collecting animals.

Halloween will be spent with Debbie handing out candy at her house. I am EXTREMELY curious as to what she is going to do with Lola. Not in the sense of where she'll be put, but what obnoxious costume she could put on her. She loves having Lola along for a ride in the car...it's pretty cute how happy she is having a new project now that her shop is closing on the first of November.

She wants to drag me to some Persian rug place downtown to look at some antique rugs for her upstairs "India" room she's going to attack in all her free time and saw one in a window

"Brilliant hun." I snorted. "You've got 6 cats and a large dog, even though your house doesn't stink."

She mentioned something about putting scotch-guard on it to protect it.

"What??" I blurted. "Debbie, it's a genuine Persian rug. NOT one of your usual ones all ratted up from the cats from Macy's. Now you can't and I won't let you laminate the fucking thing like a drivers license!"

That obviously got her in a snit.

Tonight, Debbie is dragging Kevin and myself out to dinner as a thank you for watching over the house....I wonder if her interesting in laws will be showing up?

Home Again...Getting Back to City Life

2010-10-24T20:40:00.001-07:00

So now I am home.

The apartment is in complete disarray. In addition to me not really being here I have a new bathroom being installed and then of course the bullshit with the doors and the windows, and the night that I was leaving, a notice is was given 1 hour before I had to leave to meet Jenn and Justin for the fabulous Kathy Griffin for new fridges...great, except for the fact that they demolished the largest and MOST useful cupboard in the kitchen. My kitchen was a mess from the lunch I made earlier that day, and had to not only run errands but the fumes were making me sick and I had to run over to Debbie's to get out of the apartment. So I get to spend my Sunday, cleaning house when I wanted to unwind and get used to being back in the city.

Oh how life can be annoying!

Debbie came over the moment she heard I was home and brought me back to her house so she could tell me all about Africa and her major shopping trip to the largest mall in South Africa.

Over her usual 8 o clock in the evening glass of red shiraz (first one, it is after dinner and the shop has closed...her last one is at 10, and then she brushes her teeth and is in bed by 11) and my diet coke, we clipped coupons and right before my very eyes I could see that my eccentric friend (and when she's a bitch to someone and I call her on it in front of the person, it's embarassing for her but I'm quietly closing my inner coffin and heading to heaven laughing my ass off) inspired of reading the last 4 books she has gotten from the Doubleday Book Club about Princess Diana. And perhaps was inspired by their story. In her spiffy little Betsey Johnson numbers and BCBG sundresses and shoes, she was going to speak to ALL people of colour, in a place where there was tension between the races.

She mentioned that she realized a lot about herself while she was over there and that though she was staying with family on Embassy property in both countries she was in, she wanted to meet real people out in the markets and shops. She was extremely upset how the caucasion people of Dutch lineage (the minority) treated people in the upper class department stores and boutiques.(who are all native African and very dark) with disdain and rudeness. People in retail didn't make much eye contact with the minority Dutch (which is bizarre, considering Amsterdam is filled with fabulous people) She struck up conversations with the workers and salespeople and asked them how they were doing and asked about their families and dreams, even some of the villages that they may have come from (for a reason).

After she came back from her safari trip, where she INSISTED on going someplace to bottle feed a lion cub (and somehow that was arranged through her husbands connections), and pet and feed a giraffe, and see monkeys in their habitat, (she said before she left that she had NO interest in safari, for her it was ALL about shopping). They literally had to pull her leg to get her to go, and she had SO much fun. Seeing the elephants and their babies was sweet too she said. But the cat lover in her (she has 6 of them and her house doesn't smell like cat pee thanks to electronic litterboxes and a cleaning lady) wanted to hold and feed a cub. She was in HOG HEAVEN, and I can't wait to see the pictures

She went to many of the local shop vendors run by HIV organizations to buy their jewelry, all handmade by women with HIV and men and women with family members ill with the virus. She brought me back a simple black bracelet made of thread and small handmade beads, with a few hoops woven in, and a charm. I thought that was honestly the sweetest thing anyone could give to me, especially because it came from the source and not a shop here in the US where I am sure they make a cut. I'll wear it until it falls off.

Now onto the rest of my visit. I didn't take many more photos, but I can say that Lily and I had a wonderful time. Being around Abby was a blast. She's talking a LOT now, at the age of 2 and 1/2 and has an excellent vocabulary. She LOVES book, and she not only can count to ten but when she farts she giggles and says "Toot!" seriously, I absolutely love that little girl. Every time she'd she me she'd smile and say "Hi!" and always said "Auntie..." to tell me about something she was doing or when Jenn and I met up with Abby and Justin at the beach, when we went out to eat she was SO excited to tell Auntie ALL about the sea lions she got to see on the docks, and a bunch of them flopping into the water and talking. I made the noises for her and she giggled.

The best part, were the hugs and her coming to lay in bed with me so I could read her a book. Or she'd chase me around the living room. "Abby chasing Auntie!!" she'd squeal. Music to my ears I tell ya. Even when she had her little 'terrible two's" moments (which really weren't all that often) I'd chime in. Such a little cutie.

I can't wait to be there when she is just a couple of years older and tell her I'll call Santa Claus when she's being a little shit.

Oh and puberty? Her mother and I will just be ruthless.

I'm loving being able to see her as often as I do. This time though was the great because she didn't have to warm up to me like she has, which used to take a day. When she woke up after we got home at 3am (we had to hit the 24 hour grocery store after a 2 hour drive to Corvallis (where I grew up) and then off ogThe worst part about it all, is that Justin is a school teacher and even when he comes home, he has work to do in addition to spending time with Abby. I really missed having him around. But Jenn's Mom came down (whom I have known just as long and love and adore and whenever I am visiting she comes to see me too) to of course spend time with Abby and visit with me. It's adorable seeing her being a Grandma, she's bonkers about it and spoils her rotten. She's a firecracker and was quite the broad back in the day...having friends in motorcycle gangs, owns horses, can shoot a rifle like no ones business, and build a gazebo in a denim miniskirt and cowboy boots, and what a set of gams she's got in her 50's. When she gets to last town outside of Corvallis, which is where she will lose cell reception when she gets to the mountain and forest range she starts speeding up, she gets that excited to see her grand daughter.

Lily is out cold, she's had quite the past couple of weeks not being home. I was at Debbie's housesitting for a week and then left for the coast for what was supposed to be a weekend and turned into a week. I just had too much fun.

Oh but the apartment...the apartment...and they need to not only finish the work but then they're painting and re-doing the tiles an the hallway entrances to the apartments and those of us that have porches on the courtyard (which I do, the second floors on either side of the building which are on the street have balconies). I don't know where to begin because it will just be a wreck again.

Le sigh

Sweet Friends and Holidays

2010-10-21T04:59:00.000-07:00

Since the weekend of the 9th, I have been having back to back fun it seems. My friend Jennifer, came to visit me and brought along her girlfriend Susie. Susie had fun with her new camera phone editing options. So, I am going to allow her to shine here on my little page. So that minx on the left is Susie (I called her Lazy Susan...and have since talking to her on the phone years ago...this trip was our first meeting in person and as I gather she is quite the MILF in her gully) me in the middle (obviously) like I just got busted with a camera and exclaiming "I can't believe it's PUSSY!" facial expression and Jennifer from the trees.

I'm going to let Lazy Susan be a tourist for once (Lazy Susan was what I was calling her when a bit tipsy one night years back and leaving voicemails on her answering machine via Govinda. "You put out in more directions than one, you carpet bagging slut!) as we linked arms and fell in love. The three of us laughed a lot and had fun.

Jennifer (not my main hag Jenn who lives out in the coastal mountains of Oregon) lives in a rural little town of like 60 people. Susie, lives in a populated metropolis of...I cannot recall the HUGE numbers, but she was a hoot. She grew up in Boise (though I never knew her when I lived there) and has lived in Washington State for over 10 years. How lovely that I could take 2 hayseeds out for an easy night of entertainment, pizza, and a hotel with breakkie in the morning.

The girls also went hog wild at the thrift stores. The two cracked me up. I mean, don't we "look out of control"? Do these edited pictures not seem starkly familiar about how I feel about scrap-booking? To find out you're only worth five grand in gold, is painful. Painful because I hate gold.

Ok. More fun!

Oh yeah babe!

Husband and his bitches. It was SO much fun seeing a show with these two. As you can see by our expressions, we are beyond excited.

Kathy was in the process of telling us that her crotch (her 'girl' as she put it) likes to not only party all the time, but that our girl has a lot to say and has many opinions.

The show was a one nighter, sold out (and true to form she announces it by flipping the bird and taking a bow), and per usual she has a LOT of snarky things to say and everyone is getting smacked: Oprah, The Housewives of Bravo, Paris Hilton, and...Elizabeth Hasselbeck from "The View". But first off:

The highlight of the evening was when she just noticed that there was a sign-language interpreter for a deaf audience member nearly 1/2 way into the show and said "That's it sister, you're getting carpal tunnel!" and went into an extremely foul, filthy tirade of profane words and one liners and the interpreter kept up with her and was laughing her ass off the whole time and didn't miss a beat. Kathy, gave her a bow of "I'm not worthy!" and said she was glad that the interpreter was staying, because she's had them leave before due to their taking offense to what comes out of Kathy's mouth.

The best part, is what she said about Elizabeth Hasselbeck from "The View". I don't watch the show for the very reason that Elizabeth is on there. Like Janice Dickinson, just because you give someone a new set of boobs and a set of good shoes doesn't make them someone who cannot be a loose cannon and just say the dumbest of shit. I believe they keep her on the show because Barbara Walters believes she's dumb as a post and thus must be documented for the masses.

One day, a few months back. Elizabeth who is just pissy and childish was acting extremely rude during a moment when Kathy was promoting her show and her book. Also, Kathy was talking about her mother who is a celebrity in her own right for being on Kathy's reality show and how her mother watches FOX News, which we all know is conservative in their views and has nutbag talk show hosts like Bill O'Reilly who is a major psychotic asshole (which I believe Elizabeth mainlines...look him up, he's crazy... when she is not freebasing the pubes of our previous President) Well, when ya do something stupid or try and throw down out of nowhere with a person like Kathy and it is obvious you have a producer yelling into your earpiece to shut up...well...This is what follows:

tee hee...

Well, and as expected...in addition to flat out calling Elizabeth a stupid bitch, Kathy explained what happened as she was leaving the set. Elizabeth not knowing that really there were a LOT of Kathy's fans in the audience (Kathy speaks fluent English and Homosexual Man) wasn't receptive to Kathy saying "Just be a man and shake my hand." which she finally meekly did. Kathy says goodbye to everyone else, turns to walk off the set and her cell goes off in her pocket and her assistant meets her in the wings.

When Kathy walked off the set, Elizabeth made a very violent kicking motion in Kathy's direction which she was informed about on twitter by her gays in the audience. heh heh. Did Liz not think Kathy wasn't going to turn around and see this shit? I agree, Elizabeth is a stupid bitch!

I did manage to get some footage of her on my camera, and my laugh is there. But of course, some dipshit security person caught me and (rather rudely) told me to turn off my camera.

I don't think Kathy would care! It's fan footage and a documentation of her show.

Then...after the show...I was off...

I grabbed my puppy and to the woods I ran.

The silence is bliss.

You know who, Jenn and Abby

Lily and her gay "acquaintance" (he's not down for play, only a lap) Queen Benson, seriously the faggiest dog I know.

I am happy to be at my home away from home. Every time I come to see Jenn, Justin and Abby in the last couple of years I have really yearned for being in a smaller community for quite some time. Now that Abby is REALLY talking up a storm and for once isn't shy around me upon seeing me for the first time since we last parted, I am seriously having a wonderful time hearing my name (and it nearly brings a tear to my eye), after it follows the word Aunt. I'll explain why, someday down the road. But it is very special to me, as is this little girl. Lily as you can see, enjoys her visit. Initially, it was just going to be a Friday til Tuesday trip.

Well, we keep coming up with things we want to do and I have yet to purchase my train ticket. Having so much fun thrift shopping, playing with Abby, getting things done around the house, cooking...too funny. So sometime by Saturday at the latest....and I am not complaining one bit!

Tomorrow is my dedication to finding housing in the area, HIV care, etc if I was to move to the coast, make phone calls and deciding on school once and for all. All the while visiting still and trying my new meds.

My medical marijuana grower was a peach and I have been enjoying the fruits of his labor. I got to meet him Sunday, and he was a gem. A big rhinestone that Liza would be wearing gem.

Caterpillers. There are tons of them out right now in this neck o the woods

Bliss. Pure Bliss.

All excited to go outside and play with her gay.


Abby flashing me her gang signs involving pretzels and Hotwheels

Abby and her 2 Queens.

She really is a country girl at heart.

Auntie is encouraging the dogs to play, much to Abby's delight.

Dawgs of all shapes and sizes...who was in heaven?

The ever shadowing Bailey. Who would wait by the bedroom door waiting for me to get up. He's done that since he was a puppy whenever I have visited.

The little bridge on the property that leads to the campground on the property.

Oh the beautiful walk.

Lily getting the party started at the campground...

Gotcha!

Lily captures her victim.

I LOVE my fucking dog! Look at her! That expression in mid POUNCE!

It's so hard being around someone you adore so much, the person who seriously is who you would call your sister who literally is the stay at home parent, with a shit ton of possibilities for crafts. The utter enjoyment I get in being around Abby is wonderful, she cracks me up. She can count, she knows colours, and so many words. She talks a LOT. Lily of course is in heaven with all the property to run on, Abby, and the other animals. Especially, their new cat Mabel. They have become VERY chummy!

Yesterday we spent the day thrift shopping, and Jenn got lots of fun little things...but she also got a MuuMuu!! An authentic one from way back, and the cotton fabric itself is awesome. I'll post pictures of it later.We even got some cute little piggies to come say hello! Jenn said that no matter where they are, they will run along the field to the area where you can get out of their car and say hello. Such sweeties! They didn't smell, and the property they're living on was pretty clean. I hope these are being raised as pets! I didn't see Barbara the cow here from the last few times I have been here. These pigs and some sheep were in the pasture.

Lily didn't know what to make of them...but they came right up to the fence...the three little piggies...OH SHIT! I hope some redneck doesn't "huff and puff" and shoot them!

Sometime this week, I'll get home. No complaints, I am enjoying the silence, and my friends.

Going On Holiday....

2010-10-15T13:18:00.000-07:00

Yay!!! Final countdown! Tonight I am seeing Kathy at 7:30, and then after laughing my ass off...I am picking up Lily and heading to the coastal mountains to visit with Jenn and Justin.

I'll post a nice long email whilst on holiday...

(insert Guy Pearce singing an altered version from Priscilla)

"A coastal holiday...let's pack the dog away...you bring the lunch and tea..."

Lily and BFF Lola

2010-10-07T19:51:00.000-07:00

Lily and Lola...playing happily! I SO hope Debbie keeps Lola...look how much fun they have!

Hunt for Annoying October

2010-10-02T11:55:00.000-07:00

Liz and I chatted on the phone again last week and actually got to visit for a few hours (google talk ROCKS! I can call anyone's phone and everyone on my gmail free in the USA or Canada)...and it was a funny and usual discussion: family, pets, laughter, friends/people we know, sex, her former drinking, my former drug use (and remembered how blessed we were and are to have won over those addictions), secrets, and just catching up in general. It is always so hard to get off the phone with her, not that I want to when it happens, but because I can babble with her for hours just about anything and everything.

Her Christmas/Birthday prezzie came early in the mail, and I couldn't wait to tell her, I just get too excited when giving gifts. I bought her the Absolutely Fabulous Season's 1-3 on DVD as a gift and I had to ask her if she owned the series yet, and thankfully NO!

I was over at Debbie's house (which is 2 blocks away from my own), watching television and using the internet wi-fi signal in her house to list some surplus inventory from her shop online for her, and waiting for Deb to get off work because she wanted to go shopping for some new shoes, a dress, and get something for dinner. In a mood and of course wanting JUST the right pair of shoes for her trip to Africa next month (gotta love a woman who is spending all that money to fly to a foreign country just to stay on the property of the American Embassy...at least she doesn't have to worry about getting explosive diarrhea from eating bad cheese) I knew exactly where to take her. My neighbour down the hall works in the shoe department at Nordstrom, and Debs was happy that they were having a shoe sale. I walked right up to the rack, found her the shoe of her dreams and my neighbour got the sale.

Then we had lunch.

Crazy shit happening in my neighbourhood these days, and most of it concerns Debbie.

Some guy that her husband Dewey has known for many years, is in the process of getting a divorce. The guy is a drunk and his wife finally said enough, and took the kids and the cats and kicked him and his dog Lola out and said "Stay out." until he gets his shit together. Not wanting to give up drinking a 12 pack of cans a day (of nasty cheap beer! oh the smell and the utter shame of it!) he and the dog were awaiting to move into his new apartment. Only to find out, that the owner changed their minds on the dog and he was going to take Lola to the pound! This happens on Monday.

One look at Lola and I couldn't let him do it, nor could Debbie. This happy and very sweet Black Labrador (something about the Pacific NW of the USA has nothing but Pit Bull terrier or Lab hybrids of some sort as a popular pooch especially in rescues) of course wagged her tail right into my heart (I'm sure none of you are surprised in that respect) and I just couldn't bear to think of her going to a place where if they couldn't find a home for her, she'd be put to sleep. So Debbie is fostering Lola at her house, and I am getting Lola out to the park with Lily. Lily doesn't care what size a dog is, they're fair game for playing and they love chasing one another around Debbie's yard. So in addition to helping out with Debbie's shop (which she is retiring from on November 1st) I'm helping out with Lola and walking her several times a day.

Then on Thursday, Debbie got hit by a car whilst walking on her way over here yesterday (I wasn't home, and Debbie lives 2 blocks away from me) with Lola. The driver was speeding, hit her as she jumped on the hood (she has mild whiplash and her lower back is all bruised, luckily she's not dead!). The douchebag was either leaving the post office or the pub, the way he gunned it through the light a block away from where he hit her according to the skidmarks left. He got out, asked her if she was ok. She of course says "No, motherfucker!" and the fucker got in his car and took off...dumbfuck, as if my girl can't remember a plate number for the damn vehicle. Lola wasn't hit but she took off, in a neighbourhood (frightened) where she doesn't know anyone and I found her a couple blocks away a couple hours later when I found out Debbie was in hospital.

So she's all banged up and on painkillers, and I'll be babysitting her house and cats when she leaves for Africa in a week for a 11 days. Nice huh? I hope the boys in blue locate that fucker who hit her!

Hopefully, I will have found a permanant home for Lola. If not, I know of a rescue that might (and hopefully) will be able to take her. But I am not giving up. She's too darned sweet, and loves kids (as labs usually do). Keeping options open, I wish I had the space and the house and the means to take her myself. Anyone who knows me, knows that I dream of living out in the country on a big plot of land with a few dogs, of all shapes and sizes...so you know this whole thing just has me sad. All Lola has to do is just look at me with those eyes and her facial expressions and EVERYTIME with her smiling face and wagging tail she gets me.

Such peril!

Jenn's Mom liked Lola's pics and is considering it..but then again so are a few other people...I just hate not knowing she is a pooch in limbo.

This is yet another example of animals getting to me. That's why I don't have cable for one reason, because I'd be watching Animal Planet which is 95% about domestic animals and lots of the shows are about rescue efforts. There are problems like global warming, and all I'm concerned about is kitties and dogs finding a home. Seeing me on petfinder.com is a hoot too, looking at dogs and cats of all ages and breeds and mixes, drooling like one of the very animals I am looking at.

Can't help it. Animals just sooth the beast within, I love them too much.

On to other business.

I'm beyond excited that I get to attend my first comedy concert, at Oregon's best venue for such...and it's going to be Kathy Griffin. My dream would be to see a show of hers in New York, at Madison Square Garden, which she has no problem selling out.

It's so sweet, that Justin is taking his 2 wives (Jenn and myself...he knew that one when they got married...he didn't just gain a mother in law!) and I to a show, and in the nearly 20 years that he and Jenn have been my best friends we have NEVER gone to a show together.

A few years ago, we were supposed to see Lily Allen at yet another landmark in Portland: The Crystal Ballroom. But, my girl Lily wasn't allowed in for awhile for punching a paparazzi dude (atta girl, even though I was in rehab when the concert was to be, I'd have bought her a shot for doing that!) and the concert was canceled.

Then, on Jenn and Justin's anniversary (mine too obviously) in August, Jenn told me we were going to see Kathy.

I love being married!

After the show, we're coming to pick up Lily and we're off to the coast for a few days. I'm excited, because I'll get to see Abby again and she's talking so much more. She's quite the gabby Abby, I can hear her on the phone when I'm talking to Jenn. She knows who I am too and talks about Lily. It's the sweetest thing. I'm bananas over having a niece!

Also, I will get to meet my new Medical Marijuana grower. He's a gay man that lives on the coast as well, with his husband (they're both nurses) and his one of his adopted teenagers that he has raised since the child was a youngster. He has 2 sons, and he's just the involved father. He's an involved parent. They're also hosting an exchange student from Spain.

Oregon's medical marijuana laws (which like all medical marijuana laws in the US, are state laws. Federal law of the land can still persue charges against patients, growers and caregivers if they so desire) deem that a cardholding patient may possess 1 and 1/2 pounds of weed at any given time. If I am carrying any on my person (which usually is a nice little batch) and a pipe, then I must carry my card with me at all times as well. Nothing is of course said about the added benefits: pot butter, oils, cookies, etc. The grow sight can only have so many mature plants per patient, and if it is an indoor setup like my grower has, there are constantly harvested and revolving plants. So, I am excited to be able to meet him finally and also pick up what I endearingly call "meds" and see the site for myself.

Trina also gave me a BEAUTIFUL piece of glasswork to smoke out of...will post pics later.

It's 10am as of this writing, and the roofers are here on a Saturday. Le sigh!

I am so tired of this whole construction business and the constant messes all over the place. Because of a leak that for years now that I have been bitching about, now I am getting a new bathroom wall because of the extensive damage that the rental company somehow couldn't have figured out, was going to happen and was a more extensive leak than they thought (ya think?).

It's driving me nuts, all of this noise and mayhem. Obviously with it being Saturday, I don't know what to expect anymore.

So, to add to the perversity of it all I am going to watch 2 movies.

I've been craving some Edie Sedgwick, so I'm going to watch "Ciao, Manhattan". Just so I can see the fabulous 60's of her life in flashback pics and stories, as I shake my head in the utter sadness of the footage of her in the film where her character is a burnout...which by the point this film was made, is really proof of life imitating art.

Then afterwards, I'll watch a really hard to find documentary that I found on the net called "Manson", which was made in 1971 which is nothing but footage of the Manson family who were free at that time after the murders and ensuing trial.

I saw it many years ago, and it was disturbing then.

I read that there is going to be a remake of the Joan Crawford classic "Mildred Pierce" with Evan Rachel Wood...can I say that I am beyond annoyed?

Happy weekend everyone!

Questions About A Pudding: For My UK and Down Under Dames...Mazzy needs YOU!

2010-09-26T16:28:00.000-07:00

I was wondering if I was to make a Yorkshire Pudding, is it possible to use the drippings from say...a turkey loin or breast? What about a roasted chicken or Turkey drippings? All recipe's that I have seen all mention beef. I'm sure pork would work too, but I'm wanting to cut down on fats but still try making one...am I going to have to bite the bullet, and blame smoking my medical grade marijuana that made me get the munchies to make a beef roast?

Ideas?

Thanks ladies!

Of Muumuu Housedresses and Rainy Days...

2010-09-20T23:07:00.000-07:00

Sweet Liz, made me this lovely piece of tackarama this summer. I just realized that I NEVER posted any pics of it! How shitty of me! But, my Liz gets me and she knew EXACTLY what to make and what colour. Lately because it has been raining and I haven't been able to go outside, I have been wearing it around the house out of boredom and glaring at my makeup bag while chainsmoking, pissy that Liz isn't around the corner. I REALLY miss that girl, I haven't seen her in a few years and it is high time for usual hijinks and mayhem...all involving anything that sparkles and is camp.

Seriously, I better see that bitch soon...I feel like a fag without a country, and those people worrying about gay marriage think they have problems...who else am I going to call and say "Sequins? Glitter? M.A.C cosmetics?" These are the days of crisis my dears!

I look like a pregnant housewife going through chemo...but what the hell...I LOVE it! I've come to embrace me and what God gave me...even if I am with Liz on the boredom of Weight Watchers and keeping track. Here Jenn and I are when we were on holiday in June at the beach house. Little Abby can be seen too. Jenn tells me Abby talks about Lily and I a lot. That seriously makes me almost teary eyed that the little girl loves her big gay Auntie.

Ya know, had I had a big gay Auntie when I was growing up, I wonder what I would have turned out like.

Oh the thoughts!

Oh the fucking rain has already started!

It wouldn't have anything to do with it being the middle of September, and in Oregon would it? Downpours like crazy...it is going to usher in 7 months of more rain.

Kind of feel cheated, again in the sense that summer started pretty late because of all the rain we had well into June. This part of the country is bizarre. I remember getting snow in Boise as late as May sometimes.

So will begin my darkest months weather-wise

Not dark in the sense that I'll be getting depressed, but I'll sure be dealing with insomnia even worse than I already am. So, I'm thrilled to be on a vitamin D supplement that seriously has worked wonders.

Oh the annoyance of insomnia!

I've been on the same HIV regimen for over 3 years now, and I've had higher spikes in my tcells count (almost to numbers that almost rival a person who isn't HIV+) yet I always seem to return to the 400-500 counts (even with an undetectable viral load) and I wonder if I should change, to see if I will have better luck in the numbers counts. 1 pill a day treatment for HIV is a pretty nice regimen compared to the ones in the very beginning of my "ass influenza" (as I endearingly like to call it).

I wonder what else needs to change.

I read Liz's blog, and we both are trying to do the Weight Watchers thing. Though I will now confess I have gained back 8 lbs of what I lost and it sent me into a panic...and right into the arms of a crepe cart downtown to drown my miseries in one with Swiss cheese, mushroom, avocado, and caramelized onions.

Oh my GOD! I thought I could do this on my own, and I REALLY DON'T WANT TO ATTEND a Weight Watchers meeting. Isn't it bad enough that it is mandatory that I attend an ongoing program over recovery from my former addiction to meth, to live in this construction hazard of a home I am living in. You know what? This weight gain I can attribute to the fact that my world has been turned topsy turvy, and it has effected the journaling and such that I must do in the deluxe home kit. If Jennifer Hudson can do it, so can I...but seriously, as soon as I started that diet, 3 week later, the madness began with construction.

I'm having a big gay melting fagdown about it in that respect. Especially when you l have to leave the comfort of your own home, that the workers cause messes you have to clean up when you get back home, having to decide when and if Lily comes with me, legal notices not carrying correct entry dates into my place for construction...and being up at such ungodly hours for me (I am NOT an early morning person), and the noise. The agency really should have moved us.

Jesus, it's no wonder I want nothing but Thai Chicken Skewers 24/7!

When you cannot even stay in the comfort of your own home because you have constant interruptions (Brian is complaining that he can't even have a wank when gets home from work at 8am) you cannot even begin to think of meal planning. It seriously sucks! When I get home, to my filthy apartment (filthy from all of the mess that they have made drilling holes, replacing windows, etc...) the last thing I want to do after cleaning up after them is cook something healthy. It pisses me off! So you run for something quick and easy that you can whip up, which because I have been running all day, I am craving carbs...and the bad ones, namely anything that goes atop a nice bowl of steamed jasmine rice. LIZ HELP ME!!

Then the rain.

Oh the rain.

But this is "small fry" compared to shit that is going on in the world, so I shouldn't be so selfish.

Stacey asked my if my blog name that I sign off as, this "Mazzy Boy" character had anything to band all you cool peeps in the know would remember from the 90's, Mazzy Star. In many ways, yes. I always appreciated their music, and have come across people in the past few months where the name Mazzy was applied. Stacey is such a lamb, for sending me the mp3's of an earlier incarnation of the band, when they were known simply as "Opal". Seriously, it was so thoughtful of him to take the time and send me the tracks in an email. He's a lover of music and I am so stoked that he sent me the music, which I of course passed on to other people who would be interested.

Well, cheers to a fucking autumn full of rain!

Oh How I LOVE Nice Vintage!

2010-09-18T00:45:00.000-07:00

Oh the peril and the agony!

I feel so guilty, complaining about construction that they're doing on my apartment building (in our apartments while we still inhabit them, and not at all secure or up to code) when there are natural disasters happening all around the world...but seriously! I'm with everyone when it comes to the mess...it's annoying! Oh and the noise!

If it wasn't for the fact that there are some subcontracters that are installing windows from the Ukraine that are adorable, I would say this mess would be unbearable. I just get annoyed at being woken up so early and having to schedule appointments and errands around them being in my apartment, which will depend on if I take Lily with me.

Poor bastards...36 units of queens with their stingers out, and I'm on the first floor. I cannot begin to tell you about the fags upstairs dealing with leaks during the roof replacement.

Not going well for them.

But there is always something on the bright side that happens that brightens my day, and the past couple of days there have been fabulous surprises.

Case in point?

Well, I've been super envious of these new blogs that I have been sniffing around (Ivy's blog and Helga most respectfully) and envious of all these adorable little second hand outfits they've been finding.

I popped into a vintage shop today, where the owner turns out to be an old faghag friend that I haven't seen since I was 21, named Eva.

"Whatcha lookin' for babes, I'll cut ya a deal!" after she gave me a hug and we caught up.

I have been wanting a windbreaker type raincoat, but of the variety that is mid calf length.

Grabbing my hand she dragged me over to a modish late 60's vintage Christian Dior military style breaker that carried the price tag of 90.00 in her shop.

"Try it on..." she said excitedly and it of course fits. "Honey, it looks divine on ya. 5 bucks and it's yours. I bought it at an estate auction a couple weeks ago."

Vintage Christian Dior at 5.00, with an excellent cut (not to mention EXCELLENT condition) and beautifully tailored details, lined in wool and satin and made in Paris? How could I turn that down?

I was happily swinging my shopping bag home and despite all the noise, another surprise awaited me in my mailbox: some online shopping arrived.

Anyone who knows me, is aware of how much I LOVE the FABULOUS animated show that was on MTV from 1997-2002: Daria. Daria was a spin-off of a more famous (and in my opinion stupid) MTV cartoon, Beavis and Butthead.

With her black pleated skirt and big glasses, and knee high combat boots with her artist friend Jane, Daria's cynical outlook and monotone voice, is the coolest chick in highschool and the symbol of all the hip geek girls wandering the halls of highschools all over.

I'll admit, I'm a pretty hardcore Daria fan. The cast of characters is hilarious: her parents, her classmates and teachers, not to mention her coniving school headmistress and prissy little sister who is vice president of the Fashion Club.

Pure love!

Since the series ended, they never released it but for a couple episodes on VHS back in the day and 2 films on DVD. The main reason, was because the series had contemporary music of the day playing throughout the series. In many ways, it was what made it cool because it was a hodgepodge of different genres as well as other eras in music.

The licensing of all of those clips (hundreds a season) was the main reason the collection was never released in full, on DVD.

Until now, and I own it!

For years, I have had bootlegged files of the show gathered from various sources on the internet, all of them in english, and some even have blurbs in Polish and Russian that just pop up out of nowhere. The sad part of it is, is that you can see the characters emoting, and the eastern block blabberings all are in monotone.

Oh, Nyet!

I can honestly say, that no matter how much a fanatic I am about the show, that even though the music is changed, I'm not bummed about it. It's so nice to be able to watch it on the telly, and not on my laptop and finally being able to enjoy it.

Guess I really am a geek!

R.I.P Michael: * 28 years old * Date of birth: Nov 8, 1981 * Date of passing: Sep 2, 2010

2010-09-13T16:35:00.000-07:00

We only hung out once...a coffee night with friends after our stint in rehab and you came to visit, and we made each other laugh a lot...I'm blessed to have that one memory with you.

Keeping Up Appearences

2010-09-06T15:58:00.000-07:00

First off, can I just say that I am so relieved that after hearing about the earthquake in Christchurch, that I when I ran to Auntie Helga's blog I was so glad she posted and let us all know that she was ok. True to form, she'd had a couple glasses of wine and fixed her hair and put on a brave face (not to mention a tiara) to walk around her hometown to look around. I think that what I found most touching about her pictures she posted that day, was not only is she dressed to the nines but the expression on her face in the pictures showed glimpses of sadness with damaged buildings in the background, as she stands at a bus stop.

She'd donned a cute frock and jacket, got some groceries, took some snaps, downed some wine and sweetly let us all know, that all is well and friends and family are ok too. A few people she knows sustained more damage than she did in her home (her damages according to her were pretty minimal) but that everyone is soldiering on.

That my dears, is class!

Not to mention earning my admiration of strength and energy to still get dolled up. Helga joins the ranks of Dolly Parton in my book. Why? Dolly Parton has said that it doesn't matter what is happening: a fire, a quake, whatever...NO ONE is going to see her without her face put on and everyone else be damned.

Class baby...class act!

It is nice to know that in the face of natural disasters that I have people I adore out there in the world that I have never even met that are diving into their closets and checking themselves in the mirror before braving ruined streets to survey the damage and go on with life.

Her idol, a certain Mrs. Slocombe from "Are You Being Served?" couldn't have done it better.

Though, outfits aside (and when her honey told her she might need to pack up some things in case they had to leave their home, she goes right to her racks of clothes and wonders aloud what to take!) it is sad to know that there are old antiquated buildings that have been condemned in many neighbourhoods, and silt and rubble in abundance, and still they are having to contend with aftershocks.

Thoughts and well wishes to our peeps down under...

Much Ado About...

2010-08-30T22:50:00.000-07:00

"I don't care where we go, as long as they have a Chanel!"

Brilliant line, spoken by Sharon Osbourne (my dream mother) in the 4th season of "The Osbournes" as she and the rest of her brood try and decide where they're going on holiday which was a lovely find online. I don't have cable, I don't keep up with most of what is on TV. Quite honestly, the internet has made it so you can watch whatever type of documentary, television show, cinematic film, to keep one fulfilled. I am kind of a goof, getting into some TV shows a few years after they peaked and then finished. It is always such a treat because you can watch everything back to back. (word to my friends that live outside of the US, find a torrent site or download site and get "Modern Family" which has to be the best docu-sitcom on television: excellent cast, and excellent story lines, and really funny...there is even a fag character who is gay in real life on there that could fuck me paralyzed, he's so cute...his name is Mitchell on the show). So I own the first season of the Osbournes, and now I have downloaded season 4 and am watching it, and I can tell I have missed a lot in between. I loved the show when it first came out, and rooted for Sharon when she lay in bed sick with colon cancer and chemo, and she still ran the Osbourne empire. Can't help it, even though I am not into his music, Ozzy (drunk or sober, you can't tell..he's always mumbling) is a cool dude and I love his wife. So, thanks to Gwendolyn Grand telling me she's been catching up (in response to my getting her majorly addicted to Kathy Griffin's "My Life on the D-List" which I think EVERYONE should be addicted to) on the Osbournes and inspired me. All I can say, is that Kelly Osbourne's bedroom is to DIE for with it's 60's inspired minimalism, and I love how much of a nutbag Sharon is about all her dogs.

I had to get out of the house today, at random...bothered that I have yet to meet up with this lovely girl named Roo who answered my ad on Craigslist seeking someone to go to the dog park with me. Actually, it wasn't at random. Trina messaged me late last night, and hinted that she wanted me to come visit her for the day, as she just had a radical hysterectomy last week and wanted some company. So late morning, Brian and I took the light rail to go and spend a few hours with her. Brian had gotten off his graveyard shift and needed a nap, so off they went to take naps after a few sessions of medicating and playing baseball on wii.

So, I took the opportunity to call my #1gay man Liz, for a giggle.

Why? Ok, I have to confess that the dish about the Woody Allen wedding was eating me up inside, and somehow I have to find a way that I can spill the beans on this page without naming names that can be somehow researched. Believe me, it's a doozy and it was so much fun calling up a girlfriend and just dishing about shit. I will give you a hint that one of the major players in the story is obviously a closeted mess, (and of course Liz knows a fag with her eyes closed and can smell one a mile away) was there with me. SO nutty...I promise to get to it soon. I just have to figure out how I can spill the beans without getting caught (smile)!

It was a lovely chat, I miss that girl and looking at her self portraits on her page just really make me smile and think back to when I'd paint her face. I have 2 muses, Rebekah, but Liz was and will always remain my first. So knowing that she's busting into her bag and playing around taking pictures just being goofy makes me miss her all the more. Hearing her laugh and her humour...good lord...she's a Dame, and one of the best. Miss having her around, and what a wasted time we had in a fight of a few years...so much catching up, I haven't seen her in several years and it has been long overdue! Well, pretty soon we'll figure something out. It's just been too long. Oh we didn't talk of "cabbages and kings" but of diets, weight, American Vogue magazine and how excited we get when a model from the heydays that we both grew up loving in the magazine (and when 95% of the layouts were on an ongoing orgasm of beauty) are making an appearance, and I she insisted I get the newest fall issue fatty of Vogue.

After all, it is inspiration. We even talked about making sequin and rhinestone nuns habits...mmmm how Divine!

Lately I know that I have complained about where I live. I turn 35 in December and the idea of going back to school has been swimming about my head. I know I am dissatisfied with living in a big city.... for the time being. But honestly it is in my nature to want a change of scenery. I always come back to Portland in the end, but I keep on dreaming of the coast someplace, and looking at their community colleges and though a few of them are quite respected being as such I couldn't find anything of interest that I would want to do in the areas I am interested.

Going to cosmetology school, I know that I would excel in. One of the community colleges my city, has an awesome cosmetology school on their campus, and it is a 2 year program where you learn the works: Hair, Nails, and Esthetics and when you graduate not only are you able to take your exams for the boards of Cosmetology, but you also get an actual associates (of creative arts I think? I misplaced the brochure) degree.'

Do I sabotage myself or really think that I am forcing myself to dread having to do all three for 2 years? I really have no interests (much less the patience for my own) in doing hair. I think the only thing I'd want to really learn, is to do ethnic hair. My city is so diverse and doing the hair especially of women of African heritage can be super fun, I think my city has more wig and hair shops per capita) But hair isn't where my talents are and has never been an interest. All I'd want to do is colour hair and even then I'd insist of shades of Manic Panic colours or other brands of the like. I EXCEL in doing that...30 volume hair bleach and I are like one person! But to attend that school I would have to take all three, and it is full time. The idea of that degree, dangles in my face.

My rent for the type of housing I am in (a government investment in a non-profit program in a hip neighbourhood for people with HIV) despite the fact it is getting a makeover, would be actually a safe bet to stay with until I complete school. But the catch is, is that one cannot live in this complex and go to school full time. which is exactly what that school requires...and I'd have to learn to do hair and be in school for 2 years. But I would also get an Associates Degree in addition to a degree in Cosmetology....oh what to do what to do!!

That is one dream.

Then of course I could go do facial and esthetics in some beauty school somewhere out of town or at some mom and pop place here and show them I REALLY know my shit in makeup and skincare. Even though we would get kits and supplies for such and I'd get a ton of new makeup, I'm a snob and know my shit (ask anyone) from magazines and working in that industry (all without certification). To be a makeup artist in Oregon you don't have to have license. But everything else that comes with the face (peels, microdermabrasion, etc...) I'd need to be in school. Though getting a bitchy customer that needs a wax would be reward enough for me to just enroll!

On the other hand, I want to also learn photography. Sadly even though everything is digital, I am holding out hope that some school still uses the old school method. Though, if I went digital...student loans, scholarships, and grants, would be kinda fun for shopping supplies:software, a new computer (and I'd get an Apple this time around), a camera....

Oh I just don't know where to begin!

All people I admire are doing something: Helga and Liz sew, my friend Jenn quilts like a fanatic and Jolie just finished school for web-design.

Maybe I am ready to take those steps finally and quit kicking around the ideas and conquer my phobia of being out in the world.

Because of my health, I do qualify for grants for what falls under the guidelines of disability but also since I suffer from depression (though I haven't had a day of the blues in 3 and 1/2 years) there are scholarships specifically that cater to people with depression...so, I am doing a lot of research online and trying to make my decision.

What do I owe to this sudden burst? Well, when I had my bloodwork done (which I am supposed to get every 3 months, but it had been 8 months since I last had my tests done) to check on my HIV levels, they discovered that my vitamin D levels were very very low. So, I am taking massive doses of it once a week, and honestly, I thought I felt fine before, but I feel even better and have more motivation.

So obviously that has my wheels turning.

Lots to think about for sure.

Oh and by the way, I have to plug the M.A.C Viva Glam campaign again.

M.A.C Cosmetics' Viva Glam spokespersons, Cyndi Lauper and Lady GaGa have launched limited edition lip-glass' to go with their respective shades of Viva Glam lipsticks for the M.A.C AIDS Fund . For all of you in the know, there are already 5 lovely shades in the collection where every cent of the retail selling price of Viva Glam, goes to the fund. There are also cute little bags for sale also with the Cyndi and GaGa shades where all proceeds go to the fund as well. As a person with HIV I can honestly say that I have seen and benefited from programs that M.A.C has given grants to.

So open up them purses and get your glam on!

Famous Dames: Part 2

2010-08-24T21:59:00.000-07:00

"When you young queens have finished quarreling, can you bring this old queen a drink?"- Queen Elizabeth, The Queen Mother calling downstairs to the kitchen, to her gay staff.

"A dame that knows the ropes isn't likely to get tied up." - Mae West

“I'm tired of straight people playing drag queens. Why can't drag queens play drag queens? They're talented, they're fabulous, they're gorgeous! ... To Wong Foo (Thanks for Everything, Julie Newmar) ? I could've puked with the exception of John Leguizamo. He's brilliant, and I adore him. When I was little, I used to watch the Connie Francis movie 'Where the Boys Are'. I would throw a T-shirt on my head and make believe that I had long, blond hair and sing with a Coke bottle.” - Holly Woodlawn (Warhol Superstar)

"We all came into this world naked. The rest is all drag."- RuPaul (Supermodel of the World)

"HIV does not make people dangerous to know, so you can shake their hands and give them a hug... they need it. I want to walk into a room, be it a hospital for the dying, a hospice for people with AIDS or a hospital wing for the sick children, and feel that I am needed. I want to do, not just to be" - Princess Diana (Queen of Hearts)

"I think that the most important thing a woman can have - next to talent, of course - is her hairdresser!" - Joan Crawford (actress)

"The problem with people who have no vices is that generally you can be pretty sure they're going to have some pretty annoying virtues." - Elizabeth Taylor (The Last Star)

"How sad that we as Christians, who are to be the salt of the earth, and we, who are supposed to be able to love everyone, are afraid so badly of an AIDS patient that we will not go up and put our arm around them and tell that that we care!" Tammy Faye (Queen of Christian televangilism, and friend to gays)

"I choose to do unattractive people, because then I can pretend they think they're attractive." - Amy Sedaris (Comedian, Actress, and Cupcake Queen)